The bartender says "WE DONT SERVE YOUR KIND HERE"

and the Mushroom replies "why, I'm a fun guy"

9/23/2008 12:06:39 PM

I wish we could make more than one thread an hour, because I sure could go for another of your hilarious threads

9/23/2008 12:07:32 PM

9/23/2008 12:08:12 PM

I did LOL, by the way

9/23/2008 12:08:46 PM

A kid was standing on a corner eating candy and an old man walks up to him.

Old Man: "Ya know, candy is bad for you"

Kid: "Oh yeah? My grand dad lived to be a hundred!"

Old Man: "Oh? Did he eat candy?"

Kid: "No, but he minded his own fucking business"

9/23/2008 12:08:56 PM

Hydrogen and Oxygen are at a bar having a drink when Gold walks in. Hydrogen yells "AU, get outta here!"

9/23/2008 12:09:47 PM

9/23/2008 12:10:04 PM

god damnit.

[Edited on September 23, 2008 at 12:12 PM. Reason : .]

9/23/2008 12:11:32 PM

you must have missed my other thread

9/23/2008 12:12:07 PM

john stamos walks into a bar. bartender says 'hey we have a drink named after you.'

john stamos says 'you have a drink named secret fag?'

9/23/2008 12:12:58 PM

this is jstpacks fault
he told me these jokes

9/23/2008 12:14:02 PM

Bacon and Eggs walk into a bar.


Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast"

9/23/2008 12:16:25 PM

hahaha

9/23/2008 12:17:00 PM

$5 dollar bill walks into a bar....


Bartender says, "hey you, get the fuck outta here. This is a singles bar"

9/23/2008 12:17:55 PM

This better not be the fun guy jo-MOTHER FUCKER.

9/23/2008 12:18:58 PM

Baby Seal walks into a bar.

Bartender says, "hey man, what can I get you?"


Seal says, "anything but the Canadian Club"

9/23/2008 12:20:11 PM

oh, thats a good one^^

you should start a joke of the day thread on the BY

9/23/2008 12:20:13 PM

what happened to the "so an electron walks into a bar" thread?

qntmgod, can you bttt the thread from the archives?

9/23/2008 12:22:19 PM

I too have had sex

9/23/2008 12:52:20 PM

^now THATS a good joke,

9/23/2008 12:59:24 PM

OMG LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

9/23/2008 1:00:21 PM

holy shite muslims.

9/23/2008 1:01:29 PM

gotta be honest

I'm loling at this thread

9/23/2008 2:03:16 PM

I didn't laugh when my high school biology teacher told us this joke freshman year either.

9/23/2008 2:18:38 PM

THIS IS MY FAVORITE JOKE. EVER.

<3

9/23/2008 3:37:05 PM

Quote :

"Hydrogen and Oxygen are at a bar having a drink when Gold walks in. Hydrogen yells "AU, get outta here!""

LOL

9/23/2008 3:40:47 PM

A robot walks into a bar and orders a drink.

Bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here."

The robot says "Okay, but one day you will."

[Edited on September 23, 2008 at 4:33 PM. Reason : enter]

9/23/2008 4:33:36 PM

Two guys walk into a bar...

The third one ducks...

9/23/2008 4:38:36 PM

A lawyer walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "We don't serve assholes here."

A man stands up and yells, " I resent that statement!"

The bartender looks at him and asks, "Are you an lawyer?"

The man replies, "No, I'm an asshole!"

9/23/2008 4:47:37 PM

Three vampires walk into a bar. One orders a blood, the second orders a blood light, and the third orders a cup of hot water.

Bartender brings the drinks and asks the third, "Losing the taste?"

The third vampire pulls out a tampon and says, "I'm making tea."

[Edited on September 23, 2008 at 5:03 PM. Reason : -o \/\/]

9/23/2008 4:54:14 PM

haha ^ thats a good one

9/23/2008 4:58:42 PM

LOOSING

9/23/2008 5:01:26 PM

Sorry, I was thinking about when your mother loosened my belt and stuck my balls in her mouth, Jonathan.

9/23/2008 5:02:47 PM

don't ever call me Jonathan

9/23/2008 5:03:09 PM

How do you know the bartender is mad at you?

There is a string hanging out of your bloody mary.

9/23/2008 5:03:54 PM

7/28/2009 12:48:01 PM

two peanuts were walking down the street. one was assaulted.

7/28/2009 12:51:25 PM

pony walks into the bar and orders a drink
the bar tender says, "could you speak up, i can barley hear you"

the pony says "ya, sorry, im a little hoarse"

7/28/2009 12:54:40 PM

A blond walks into a bar with a pile of dog crap in her hands and says, "Look what I almost stepped in."

7/28/2009 12:55:08 PM

my favorite

A string walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and says "hey asshole we don't serve your kind." So the string goes outside, ties himself into a knot and beats himself against a wall.
He then goes back into the bar and orders a drink.
The bartender looks at him and says"arent you the string who came in earlier?", and the string says "no, I`m a frayed knot"

7/28/2009 1:10:01 PM

i can barley hear you

7/28/2009 1:10:39 PM

Quote :

"$5 dollar bill"

dollar bucks again

7/28/2009 1:34:12 PM

Draft Beers are $3 today at Mellow Mushroom.

And that's no joke.

7/28/2009 1:35:31 PM

10/10 many lols

one of my favs were:

John Kerry walks into a bar. Bartender goes "Why the long face?"

[Edited on July 28, 2009 at 2:09 PM. Reason : personal fav]

7/28/2009 2:09:03 PM

A termite walks into a bar and says is the bar tender here?

7/28/2009 2:22:33 PM

10/10
lulz.

7/28/2009 2:43:26 PM

a bear walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what'll you have"

the bear says, "I'll have a....



...


...



beer."

bartender says, "no problem, but why the big pause."

7/28/2009 2:54:14 PM

Julius Caesar walks into a bar. "I'll have a martinus," he says. The Bartender gives him a puzzled look and asks, "Don't you mean 'martini'?"
"Look," Caesar retorts, "If I wanted a double, I'd have asked for it!"

7/28/2009 3:00:26 PM

Quote :

"You know what really grinds my gears? Nobody's come up with a new priest and a rabbi joke in like thirty years. Ya know? I mean, okay, ah, umm. Priest and a rabbi go, go onto the supermarket, and, uh, the priest wants to buy a ham. And the rabbi says, "Ah, I can't eat it. It's forbidden." Couldn't eat it. Not allowed, pigs are like superheroes to them. Is it perfect? No, but I, I don't see you coming up with anything. And that people is what grinds my gears"

7/28/2009 3:02:42 PM

setmup

7/28/2009 3:40:50 PM