My airplane has a bunch of electronic receivers...one of which we can tune in to an iPod/mp3 player with an FM transmitter, then listen to music through our helmet earpieces during the mission. After rocking out to Metallica and Ben Folds Five for a couple of hours around Baghdad today on a very boring mission, we landed and made our way clear of the runway. As we taxied slowly back to the hanger (to kill a few minutes as to avoid attending a formation for a General visiting our squadron), I cued up the Top Gun Anthem. My pilot got a pretty good laugh out of it.

I no longer own a cover (uniform hat) without a huge penis drawn inside of it. If you leave anything of that nature sitting out in the ready room, then forget and leave, you can bet that it will have a dick drawn in it. If you leave for long enough, it's safe to assume that it will also be frozen in a block of ice by the time you return. If you've pissed the person off, and they can find any (kinda tough out here), it will be encapsulated in Jell-O.

May God have mercy upon your soul if you walk away from a computer without logging your account off. All sorts of humorous emails will be sent from your email address to "all aircrew" or "all officer" distribution.

We posted a picture of another squadron's commanding officer on our dartboard...it stayed there for an entire day before someone took it down.

the Hornet squadron next to us arranged sandbags on top of their hanger to read "VMFA-122 WEREWOLVES". I've seen them rearranged a couple of times to display various other messages, to include "VMFA-122 WE'RE GAY".

We killed a mouse that had infiltrated our ready room and chewed up some of our gear...someone fashioned a cardboard gallows and strung its body up as a warning to its comrades.

We've thought about jamming the other Prowler squadrons ready room radio with broadcasts of recordings of one of their guys saying some dumb shit...but we haven't gotten ballsy enough to do that, yet (although a few years ago, a Prowler may or may not have jammed a Seattle radio station for a few minutes, broadcasting Bob Marley's "Jammin'" over their frequency).

My pilot dispensed flares over the base where Maverick is deployed to...we were talking with a guy on a ground radio and thought he might appreciate some fireworks. Another time, we were test flying a jet that had just received some major maintenance...once we finished checking everything out, we still had tons of gas and nothing to do except rage around the desert...found a convoy driving through the desert and gave them a couple of nice high-speed, low altitude passes.

I've come in to land here numerous times at 20k' or more just a few miles from the runway, then rolling inverted, pulling 60-70 degrees nose down, and screaming into the landing pattern at 500+ knots. I know one guy in another squadron who came in at .95 Mach. Noise abatement and FAA regulations are not limiting factors here.


Shit, now that I look back at this post, most of it isn't really all that funny, I guess, unless you're in this sort of environment where you become easily amused. Oh well. Maybe some of you will get a laugh out of this. I'll add this thread as more months go by and we get more and more creative.

[Edited on November 12, 2008 at 5:51 PM. Reason : asdfasd]

11/12/2008 5:47:33 PM

10/10 would read again

11/12/2008 5:50:15 PM

Quote :

"I no longer own a cover (uniform hat) without a huge penis drawn inside of it. If you leave anything of that nature sitting out in the ready room, then forget and leave, you can bet that it will have a dick drawn in it. If you leave for long enough, it's safe to assume that it will also be frozen in a block of ice by the time you return. May God have mercy upon your soul if you walk away from a computer without logging your account off. All sorts of humorous emails will be sent from your email address to "all aircrew" or "all officer" distribution."

GOOD TO FUCKING GO.

11/12/2008 5:50:21 PM

something something something oh dear you have a penis hat

11/12/2008 5:50:49 PM

words


but some of it is humorous

11/12/2008 5:51:41 PM

Post your address and we'll hook you up with some jello. Let it not be said that tww doesn't support our troops.

11/12/2008 6:41:03 PM

10/10 would read again

11/12/2008 6:55:00 PM

finally

a thread i can relate to

(oh wait)

11/12/2008 6:57:49 PM

probably my best read in a long time

11/12/2008 8:37:36 PM

10/10...keep um coming

11/12/2008 8:49:42 PM

Added to my topics.

Yall want some jello?

11/12/2008 9:06:08 PM

Jamming in a combat zone to Ben Folds Five, come on man Marines are supposed to be hardcore



the mouse warning is funny though

[Edited on November 12, 2008 at 9:30 PM. Reason : .]

11/12/2008 9:29:50 PM

Quote :

"although a few years ago, a Prowler may or may not have jammed a Seattle radio station for a few minutes, broadcasting Bob Marley's "Jammin'" over their frequency"

haha nice, i cant believe it took me a minute to get that one

Quote :

"most of it isn't really all that funny, I guess, unless you're in this sort of environment where you become easily amused"

= boot camp for me. dont think ive ever laughed as hard as i did there


when i was in saudi we had a guy who took a dump in a ziplock bag, wrote "shit bag" on the front of it, and paraded it around the flightline like it was the funniest thing he had ever seen. no one joined in with him.

you guys duct tape anyone to a pylon yet?

oh and i highly recommend getting laid in the ready room if the opportunity ever presents itself

11/12/2008 9:31:18 PM

while being bored during court today, one of our buddies had to take a dump but left his radio in the jury box where we were all sitting. we proceeded to dissemble it and hide each individual piece around the jury box, judges chambers etc

11/12/2008 9:34:48 PM

yeah, same thing happens if you leave your pistol unattended around here, except that we don't scatter the pieces (being serialized gear and all. We'll just leave it disassembled on the table in front of the duty desk--a kind of "you didn't get away with leaving your pistol unattended without it being noticed."


So apparently last year when the squadron was out here, a discussion came up during a meal about the Contra code, and how they could just use it as a means of vetting people for security clearances. The commanding officer, being too old to remember the Contra code, didn't "get" that most American males of military-serving age would know it...so after establishing that everyone sitting at the table knew it (including the female flight surgeon), one of the guys leaned over and asked someone sitting at a neighboring table, who of course also knew it.

To drive the point further home, this guy then flew a mission with the CO later that day. When he called the tower on the radio for takeoff clearance, he also asked the controller if he remembered the Contra code (he did). Same thing with departure control. Asked the same thing of the boom operator on the tanker when they were air refueling during the mission--the boom operator didn't know...but the pilot came up on his radio and said "Yeah, he's only 19. I remember it, though...Up up down down left right left right B A!"


^^ Never done it in the ready room, but I did get it on in the squadron gym when I was in flight school (there was a weight room and a cardio room in the hanger).

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 8:16 PM. Reason : asdfasd]

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 8:17 PM. Reason : asdfasd]

12/10/2008 8:14:12 PM

NICE

12/10/2008 8:16:21 PM

i know i knew the contra code, i just couldn't remember it.....i was also mixing it up with the mortal kombat blood code

12/10/2008 8:18:54 PM

Hahaha

Yeah I'd be surprised if many 18-22 year olds remember it. Maybe even up to 24-26.

12/10/2008 8:19:05 PM

Sounds like Jim Halpert is in your crew.

12/10/2008 8:20:36 PM

Oh, and this young female Corporal came running into the ready room all out of breath the other night with her M-16 in one hand and a magazine in the other. Apparently she was walking to work and got chased by a jackal or wolf or something. There are some big feral/wild canines roaming around here. She was about to smoke one of them, haha.

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 8:23 PM. Reason : haha, jackal, i mean. Jackyl is a band that sounds kinda like AC/DC.]

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 8:24 PM. Reason : ^ i don't know who that is]

12/10/2008 8:22:14 PM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Konami_Code

I love wikipedia

12/10/2008 8:23:49 PM

^^ It's the guy from The Office that plays a lot of pranks.

12/10/2008 8:24:56 PM

that explains it. I've never seen The Office.

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 8:26 PM. Reason : it's not just one guy...it's pretty much everyone in every jet squadron everywhere.]

and not just jets...Maverick told me a story once about a guy who put his balls on Geraldo's mic.

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 8:27 PM. Reason : asdfasd]

12/10/2008 8:25:44 PM

Personally, I love to hear stories about our military having fun. The thing I google/youtube the most when I am having a bad day and really want to laugh is the NAVY's Numa Numa video.

And your job sounds like one of the best possible positions to have.

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 9:22 PM. Reason : ]

12/10/2008 9:22:04 PM

^I see your NAVY Numa Numa and raise you a NAVY Move Along!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMMceEx72sE&feature=related

12/10/2008 9:29:31 PM

Quote :

" My pilot dispensed flares over the base where Maverick is deployed to...we were talking with a guy on a ground radio and thought he might appreciate some fireworks. Another time, we were test flying a jet that had just received some major maintenance...once we finished checking everything out, we still had tons of gas and nothing to do except rage around the desert...found a convoy driving through the desert and gave them a couple of nice high-speed, low altitude passes."

Awesome! Glad the taxpayer is getting to pay for flare fireworks and "raging around the desert".

12/10/2008 10:02:35 PM

I think the guys putting their lives on the line deserve a sense of humor occasionally

My brother is a Navy P-3 pilot, he showed me these videos. The first is pretty funny, and the second longer video i think is only funny if you are a P-3 pilot.....tons of inside jokes i just didnt get.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r6_mVLkThE

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6554713845142828957

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 10:19 PM. Reason : .]

12/10/2008 10:17:40 PM

^^ we would've just dumped the extra gas before we landed, anyway.

12/10/2008 10:19:20 PM

So whats your favorite stuff to receive in the mail, or is mail always good in general?

12/10/2008 10:29:51 PM

pictures of my daughter

12/10/2008 10:35:42 PM

Quote :

"I've come in to land here numerous times at 20k' or more just a few miles from the runway, then rolling inverted, pulling 60-70 degrees nose down, and screaming into the landing pattern at 500+ knots. I know one guy in another squadron who came in at .95 Mach. Noise abatement and FAA regulations are not limiting factors here."

You should bring that thing to RDU and give TWW some fun runs. I call first.

12/10/2008 10:38:17 PM

so why do you throw away fuel?

12/10/2008 10:42:47 PM

so he is not riding a bomb...

12/10/2008 10:45:01 PM

^^ so we're not so heavy on landing. allows us to land at a slower speed, which is easier on tires and brakes (and can be a concern for stopping before the end of the runway, although not really here...the runway is like 13-14k' long)

[Edited on December 10, 2008 at 10:48 PM. Reason : i wouldn't say we routinely do it, but it's not unusual to dump a few thousand pounds]

12/10/2008 10:47:50 PM

EA-6B

loudest non-afterburning plane EVER. goddamn

12/10/2008 10:48:12 PM

oh yeah, definitely

the Hornets here are louder when they take off in full grunt. shakes the ready room enough to make one of the lights flash on and off (shakes my can, too, but luckily i'm a really heavy sleeper). they're relatively quiet in mil, though. the prowler is waaayy louder than a Hornet at mil.

12/10/2008 10:50:45 PM

High Speed low altitude passes on unsuspecting fishermen...

Farting into the ECU intake to ensure everyone knows your brand...

12/10/2008 10:54:57 PM

haha, great stories

12/11/2008 10:04:41 AM

^^ how high-speed are we talking, here?




Frozen cover. Phallic art not depicted in this photograph.





Left his Marine Corps Martial Arts Program belt completion certificate sitting in the ready room for at least a day...got schlonged as a result.

[Edited on December 11, 2008 at 7:37 PM. Reason : asdfasd]

12/11/2008 7:35:51 PM

Quote :

"although a few years ago, a Prowler may or may not have jammed a Seattle radio station for a few minutes, broadcasting Bob Marley's "Jammin'" over their frequency"

made me lulz

12/11/2008 8:01:46 PM

Nah, I didn't like the 'Move Along' one, but I just clicked your video an hour and a half ago and have been clicking on the related videos laughing my ass off for an hour and a half!

12/11/2008 9:14:29 PM

12/11/2008 9:17:42 PM

Quote :

"We killed a mouse that had infiltrated our ready room and chewed up some of our gear...someone fashioned a cardboard gallows and strung its body up as a warning to its comrades."

haha, that's fucked up

12/11/2008 9:31:28 PM

12/11/2008 9:33:54 PM

Quote :

"most of it isn't really all that funny, I guess, unless you're in this sort of environment where you become easily amused."

I too, can identify with this statement.

12/11/2008 9:35:10 PM

haha we had mustache May (which I won), We had a competition on who could bring more Gatorades out of the chow hall in their flight suit. Also who could go the longest without showering. How far we could let our hair grow out without anyone ordering us to cut it.

We also made this nextel commercial parody
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1bAJL2kTqI

[Edited on December 11, 2008 at 9:55 PM. Reason : .]

12/11/2008 9:54:42 PM

so whats the chances and how would i go about being able to ride in one of these jets as a citizen?

know someone that knows someone?

and im right by SJAFB

12/11/2008 10:05:55 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZ-N-Z0-B6Y

this is what drunken cops do apparently, both these guys I work with and went through the academy with. Makes no sense to me, pretty lame, and no Im not involved in this video

12/11/2008 10:11:06 PM

^^ i would say fairly close to zero. I mean, it's tough enough to set things up for our enlisted Marines to go on a flight (as in I've yet to see it happen), and there are legitimate reasons to take some of them up.

Plus, you'd have to get fitted for a g-suit and parachute harness, and receive some sort of training on the ejection seat (we had to do a "practice shot" on a training apparatus, but I don't know if that's necessary). I also don't know if any kind of swim qualification is required just to do a ride-along.

12/11/2008 10:21:57 PM

damn.

12/11/2008 11:07:43 PM