if you meet a girl, get her number, do you call or text to ask her out? Why do you choose one over the other?

8/2/2009 8:27:53 PM

people still call one another?

8/2/2009 8:29:09 PM

If I met her in person when I got her phone number, I'd call, without a doubt.

If I got the person's number online, I might text first. It also depends on the person I'm talking to quite a bit and whether or not I think they want me to call first son.

8/2/2009 8:29:51 PM

always call. call me old fashioned, but texting is a cop out, especially if you just met.

that being said, seems like girls find texting a perfectly suitable means of communication.

8/2/2009 8:29:55 PM

i wouldn't know. haven't had to do it in 4+ yrs.

however, 4+ yrs ago i called her because i didn't have texting on my phone

8/2/2009 8:30:58 PM

what if you call your phone from hers to get her number, and then she calls you like 10 minutes later? how long should you wait to call her back?

8/2/2009 8:36:22 PM

well since i hate being on the phone for more than 5 minutes....

it depends on if she talks too much or not.

[Edited on August 2, 2009 at 8:37 PM. Reason : "i like her, but she is a talker... i better text this time"]

8/2/2009 8:37:41 PM

at least 8 minutes. any less and you come across as desperate.

8/2/2009 8:37:54 PM

if i am out drinking i'll text if i'm trying to meet up again later that night but otherwise i call.

8/2/2009 8:38:15 PM

I never text.

8/2/2009 8:47:09 PM

i send a message via carrier pigeon

8/2/2009 8:48:00 PM

so like when you call a girl after getting your number what do you say? like "hey i'm that guy you met the other day" or what?

8/2/2009 8:48:49 PM

i generally fart into the phone to break the ice

8/2/2009 8:49:50 PM

In this thread, it becomes apparent who has never called a girl.

8/2/2009 8:49:58 PM

If really interested, definitely call the girl.

8/2/2009 8:51:05 PM

come on dude, you're in your 20s.



"Hey its not dnl, what are you up to? ...oh cool. Hey are you busy Saturday? We should go eat at that place I was telling you about...Awesome, I've got to run, but I'll pick you up around 7:00. Alright, I'll see you then! Bye."

8/2/2009 8:54:16 PM

Wow. This thread is surprising. I prefer to only receive texts and emails. I have a phone anxiety. Anyone else in my boat? I screen all of my calls.

8/2/2009 8:56:49 PM

^i too would rather text than talk

8/2/2009 8:57:44 PM

i'll call (don't particularly like texts, on general principles), but i kind of agree with ^^. the first time i call a chick, i get nervous. but after that i'm mostly fine

[Edited on August 2, 2009 at 8:58 PM. Reason : ]

8/2/2009 8:58:43 PM

not me, i dont mind a text but i prefer an ole fashioned phone call. Texts just seem like a cop out

8/2/2009 8:59:27 PM

yeah i too feel like texting is a cop out. but i'd rather do it than talk(at least the first time)

8/2/2009 9:00:12 PM

For a basic exchange of info, text/email is ideal. For a discussion, phone is optimal.

But if it's a "hey, want to grab a bite to eat at my fav restaurant?", then a text will suffice.

My time is valuable. Maximum face time. Minimum tech time. That's my preference, anyway.

8/2/2009 9:02:27 PM

the anxiety lies in the steps leading up to acquiring the phone number. calling is no big deal because the ice is already broken and whatnot.

8/2/2009 9:03:30 PM

I prefer communicating via missed connections on craigslist.

[Edited on August 2, 2009 at 9:05 PM. Reason : personal ads in the newspaper are a close second.]

8/2/2009 9:03:51 PM

Casual encounters trumps missed connections

8/2/2009 9:04:37 PM

who the hell calls OR texts? cop outs, both...if you really like her, show up outside her house or place of business wearing cool dark sunglasses and show her your new DSLR with telephoto lens

shows her that you think she's pretty and you want to take pictures...also that you like her enough to find out where she lives and/or works and sit outside all day waiting for her to come outside

8/2/2009 9:04:37 PM

i, too, like pretending missed connections are directed towards me

8/2/2009 9:04:57 PM

I would post a missed connection for lucy

8/2/2009 9:20:52 PM

To ask her out I would call but for general chit chat, even pre-first date, texting can be a good way to get to know the other person and probably improve the quality of the first date or help decide if you even want one.

8/2/2009 9:20:57 PM

by texting you mean tapping on your phone stuff like "wut r u up 2" on your phone, right?

8/2/2009 9:26:19 PM

I can't speak for others, but I prefer to use complete sentences and proper punctuation. "Text speak" drives me crazy.

8/2/2009 9:29:13 PM

^ oh ditto. I may not be able to spell but i unless im running out of room its always complete sentences and words

8/2/2009 9:32:38 PM

yeah, it drives me crazy too. just seems it would be hard to get to know someone via texting.

8/2/2009 9:37:28 PM

Yeah, that is true. Some people turn into the biggest bitch you've ever seen when they text you too son.

8/2/2009 9:38:26 PM

I was laughed at just the other day for proper capitalization and punctuation in my text messages.

Fuck those idiots, though.

8/2/2009 9:38:53 PM

^^^ That is very very true. If you aren't familiar with how the person communicates then certain meanings can be lost in translation.

[Edited on August 2, 2009 at 9:42 PM. Reason : .]

8/2/2009 9:39:39 PM

Call. None of that wait three days bullshit either. Call within the next day or so.

The reason you should call instead of texting is because texting is "safe" and insincere. If you call, they can hear your voice and detect any subtleties in your tone of voice. Calling puts yourself out there a little more and she will likely appreciate being called instead of receiving texts.

If she prefers texting over calling on a routine basis, you should probably move on from trying to date high schoolers

8/2/2009 9:44:54 PM

I definitely call. If they don't answer then I'll send a text instead of leaving a voicemail (I hate voicemails :mad

Really the only time I use text messaging is when I'm trying to figure out what to do for a night, or to ask a question that does not take much of a response

8/2/2009 9:46:50 PM

^^exactly. also, you can gage her interest in a phone conversation. i'm a firm believer in being able to hear a smile.

if she doesn't answer, i'll leave a voicemail. if no response, i may try once more in a couple days. if still nothing, just move on.

i move on a lot.

8/2/2009 9:50:24 PM

i also kinda hate that you have to just leave things hanging with texts, you have no idea if they were received or read. with a phone call you know whats up, you know if they are interested or not, its over and done. with text messages you have to wonder about it until you get a reply (or don't and forget about it, and thats a lot more annoying)


awhile back i met a girl and sent her a text message a few days later to see if she wanted to get some dinner. i never got any reply so i figured she wasn't interested and forgot about it. i mentioned it to one of her friends who has asking what i thought about her and she replied with, "oh, she never got the text. i was actually asking what you thought because she had been hoping you were going to call." so we finally had our date, but had it not been for her friend i would have missed the chance because she never received the text for some reason.

8/2/2009 10:08:21 PM

I have a messenger monkey

I might text to ask her if she wants to do something but i'll make the definitive plans during a call

8/2/2009 10:20:35 PM

I wait 3 days. 3 day rule. can't go wrong.

8/2/2009 10:22:56 PM

typically I quit it then hit it

8/2/2009 10:23:04 PM

What about a TWW PM? How does that compare to a call/text?

8/2/2009 10:49:55 PM

you might as well put a message in a bottle, cause no girl is ever going to see it.

8/2/2009 10:52:11 PM

yeah, youll only fall for that for so long

8/2/2009 10:52:34 PM

call

my dinosaur of a plan costs a dime a text still

8/2/2009 10:53:22 PM

I didn't know they still had those

8/2/2009 10:54:36 PM

All the girls I've dated I just kinda hung out with, then we started going to stuff just to be together, then we decided we were dating. I've only asked a girl out a few times ever. It seems like a pretty normal way to start dating to me, but it could be odd, I can't tell.

8/2/2009 10:57:26 PM

my last cell phone bill was 152 cause i went over my allowed texts by a lot

8/2/2009 10:57:36 PM