wow.

Hey CW. Remember all those nights you kept me out of the dorm room 3-4 nights a week, so you and your g/f could bang each other? (Is she still a screamer?) After 22 years I finally know how my revenge turned out. I just interviewed your kid and he is just as much of a brown-nosing, arrogant douche bag as you were while trying to tell me a very different version of how well you and I got along as roomies. After I looked at his birthday and did the math, I now know my insulin needle and your stash of condoms worked, or in your case, didn't work. I guess the stories I had heard long ago about a shotgun wedding really were true after all. Oh by the way, Jr didn't come out as a top 5 pick in the selection by my office manager. I hope he checks out CH and can pass the news back to you. The timing of meeting him and finding this site were a dream come true.
J.B., NCSU

http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793857

11/2/2009 6:20:33 PM

holy shit

Quote :

"Emilio, remember the night after you watched Paranormal Activity, when you were dragged off your bed and into the hallway which caused you to piss your pants? I still get laughing fits remembering that. Xaeroe Ecks, UT"

[Edited on November 2, 2009 at 6:22 PM. Reason : haha]

11/2/2009 6:21:27 PM

Oh karma.

11/2/2009 6:22:18 PM

lol

11/2/2009 6:22:51 PM

Quote :

"Remember when you were cheating with my girlfriend? I do too. Remember that time you woke up duct taped to a chair in her dress in the commons area after fucking her and passing out? I know I sure do. Drew Phillips, N.C. State"

11/2/2009 6:24:04 PM

I had a roommate that used to do that with my condoms (or so he said)

I just followed up my romps in the sack by delivering a swift kick to the girl's stomach

11/2/2009 6:25:00 PM

my roommates would never do that to my condoms, no matter what I did to them.

11/2/2009 6:29:35 PM

poking a hole in someone's condom has to the be the lowest of the low

passive aggressive bullshit

[Edited on November 2, 2009 at 6:32 PM. Reason : ad]

11/2/2009 6:32:38 PM

Quote :

"You wrote in to Roommate Confessions to brag about a prank you pulled on me. A prank that resulted in severe bodily injury. Well, I never mentioned it, but I did bookmark the page and show it to my parents. And our lawyer. And the dean. Guess what, dumbass? You might've looked like a badass on the internet for fifteen minutes, but you're the one who got kicked out of college and is getting sued for every cent you're worth. Checkmate, bitch. John T., School Not Given"

what a little bitch, still running to mommy and daddy after college

11/2/2009 6:33:52 PM

it's pretty fucked up to make fun of his kid too

I mean, maybe that kid would have turned out better if he was planned for in the first place

11/2/2009 6:34:19 PM

Quote :

"poking a hole in someone's condom has to the be the lowest of the low passive aggressive bullshit"

Or insanely funny depending on whether you're doing it or its happening to you.

11/2/2009 6:36:51 PM

Nah, it's pretty goddamn low.

I do not approve of that usage of diabetic supplies. That guy should get his ass beat.

11/2/2009 6:41:05 PM

the OP story is stupid.

and probably a lie.

11/2/2009 6:44:00 PM

11/2/2009 6:44:51 PM

Quote :

"Freshman year I lived with two buddies from back home and a random guy picked from housing in a quad. While the three of us who already knew each other got along well, the fourth guy turned out to be a raging alcoholic who often went on coke binges exacerbated by his ever-present roid rage. This guy was probably the biggest asshole I've ever encountered, yet he always thought he was the coolest guy at the party (with two popped collars of course). One day, he got coked up and drunk off his ass, but because it was usual for him, he could still function (walk/talk well enough), but he didn't really know what was going on. We threw him in my SUV and drove him down to the Huntington train station. From there, we bought him a one-way ticket to Raleigh, NC, pointed him in the right direction and waved goodbye as he took the 400 mile journey. When he sobered up and realized he was in NC, he called us and we fed him some bullshit about how he told us he was going for a beer run and never came back. He still doesn't really know how he ended up in Raleigh that night. Derek, Marshall University"

11/3/2009 12:50:16 AM

this site makes me
people can be so fucking cruel

11/3/2009 12:53:42 AM

^^ That is a fib. That dude would have known they were fibbing.

11/3/2009 12:54:23 AM

I shot a sock at my roommate with a potato gun....but he asked me to.

11/3/2009 12:55:02 AM

I know a TWWer who wiped a slice of pizza on the toilet and put it back in the fridge because his roommate kept eating his food. Said roommate ate the pizza. It's not me and under no circumstances will I reveal who it is.

[Edited on November 3, 2009 at 12:59 AM. Reason : l]

11/3/2009 12:59:13 AM