haha, my cat went to the space recently on behalf of NASA, conducted a hydro-thermal experiment on the moon to calculate the ratio of water to heat molecule percentage and came back to earth and tommorow planing to? go to jupiter for her next mission. beat that!

4/29/2010 9:01:37 AM

My gibbons carry GLOCK autopistols.

4/29/2010 9:02:15 AM

I'd love to beat your cat.

4/29/2010 9:02:36 AM

I wouldn't attempt that around my home.

4/29/2010 9:03:38 AM

my dog sneezed this morning when i called her an asshole for buggin me while i was makin' scrambled eggs

so i called her an asshole again and she sneezed again

so i called her an asshole again and she sneezed again

then she walked off

this story, is still better than yours, merely because it's a dog and not a cat

4/29/2010 9:04:52 AM

Quote :

"REXBURG – A domestic cat attack sends two people to the hospital. The family says their cat was completely normal until 3 days after it gave birth to kittens. The Ostermiller’s were asleep in their bed when they heard a sound. “All I heard was rrwwwrrrr hisss,” said Jackie Ostermiller. Jackie woke up and saw her cat, Renesmee, (named after the Twilight character) panicking. So she went to grab her cat to prevent her from bolting out a hole in the screen door. That’s when her cat jumped at her. “I was being mauled literally for the kill. She had got ahold of my nose first, my face first, my arms first, I was literally screaming, ‘Blaine get off get her off, she’s attacking me, get her off. He jumped up in the middle of his sleep, took his c-pap machine just jerked it off, threw it on the floor. He was literally able to pry her off of me,’” said Jackie Ostermiller. “Confusion. I woke up hearing my wife scream, I didn’t know what was going on until I looked over there, until I looked over there seeing (the cat) viciously attacking her,” said Blaine Ostermiller, Jackie’s husband. Blaine did get the cat off, but not before 35 bite marks and 15 bruises later. Then, when Jackie was washing the blood off her face, the cat came back. “Washed the blood of her face and part of her hands, she actually attacked her leg a second time,” said Blaine Ostermiller. The Ostermiller’s both saw an unusual stare right before that second attack. “She came at me with the deadliest eyes,” said Jackie Ostermiller. “I want people to know how dangerous cats can be, they can turn on you in a dime. Believe it or not, cats!” said Jackie Ostermiller."

Believe it or not, CATS!

http://www.kboi2.com/news/92190649.html

4/29/2010 9:07:01 AM

Look, if the cat is attacking you then handle it like a man.

Btw, this is why I tell people that a cornered woman with a Tasman Salt is no joke. People don't believe me, but that tiny cat has god damned hawkbill blades and look it what it can do. Hell, they aren't nearly as sharp as a Tasman Salt son. They'll produce very minor wounds in comparison to the Tasman Salt son.

4/29/2010 9:13:03 AM