i'd like to engage lewoods in a little more than conversation

I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

8/13/2009 1:23:06 PM

All my mom had to say to me was, "Do we need to go the bathroom?" (for public places) I would shut up quick and act like an angel after that statement.

Once we were at Busch Gardens with her best friend and her kids (so 5 kids total, including me and my sister, ranging from ~7 y/o to ~15 y/o).. We were all being little hellions, so my mom went up to some random vendor and bought one of those paddle-ball toys with some dancing bears on it. She ripped off the ball, gave it back to the cashier, told her "I won't be needing this" then proceeded to turn around to us and tell us if we didn't stop being little brats those dancing bears were gonna dance across our asses.


The only boy in the group got those dancing bears.

[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 1:27 PM. Reason : .]

8/13/2009 1:27:05 PM

Sexist son.

8/13/2009 1:28:37 PM

^

Maybe I should add on the fact that he was one of the worst children ever to walk this earth and was a total asshole? He knew no limits

8/13/2009 1:29:45 PM

Quote :

"You can raise kids and have them turn out fine without beating them."

Agree to a point. If the child is slow - sometimes being physical is the only thing they understand. Smart children you can communicate and reason with. Only the dumb ases need the whip.

[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 1:40 PM. Reason : smrt]

8/13/2009 1:31:18 PM

Quote :

"^^ Must have been nice. The red hand print was because I told my parents I hated them. Which was 100% true. And they just made it worse. Now my mother wonders why I never call and in general don't give a shit"

if my child was as stupid i wouldnt call either

8/13/2009 1:32:30 PM

Oh I also forgot to mention my dad had a big fish paddle with holes in it. I never got that but I think my sister did.. I got the hand mostly, and I successfully talked my mom out of a few (only once with my dad)

and yes, this thread is sad.

8/13/2009 1:40:17 PM

let's see...

wooden spoon
ruler
stick
spatula
belt
belt rack (i had hidden the belts)
boat paddle
hand
phone book

8/13/2009 1:47:34 PM

My parents whipped me with a leather belt, but definitely not for nothing. Usually for things like being disrespectful, or lying about something important that I eventually got caught doing later.

As a result I grew up very mannerly and with respect for (especially) my elders. I also learned that lying would bring much worse punishments than being up front with my parents to begin with. Coupled with my dad teaching me young that there are always consequences for actions, and you should man up and accept those, good or bad, I think whippings were helpful tools in making me an upstanding man.

Plus, I had the FEAR as well, so I kept my damned nose clean (for the most part). My rents didn't care if I had fun, as long as I wasn't doing anything REAL stupid.

PS - I also got beat for being too whiny sometimes. So I learned to man up.

8/13/2009 1:53:12 PM

Quote :

"belt rack (i had hidden the belts)"

aahaha
If my parents knew I'd hidden one of the usual implements, they made sure to find something more evil.

8/13/2009 1:54:28 PM

my granny used to get after us with the fly swatter

8/13/2009 1:56:16 PM

i spanked my kids ass with one good swat the other day.

made me

8/13/2009 1:58:27 PM

Quote :

"i spanked my kids ass with one good swat the other day. made me "

Makes the "This is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you." seem legit, huh?

8/13/2009 2:03:53 PM

Quote :

"belt rack (i had hidden the belts)"

haha i'm going to be a terrible parent. I'd probably reward this.

I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

8/13/2009 2:08:38 PM

i guess i got spanked a few times (like maybe 3 times)...when i got caught stealing candy from the local store, I had to pay them $100 with my $5 a week allowance...when I lost a new watch in the woods, I had to buy a new one with my allowance...these are the things that rational parents do to corral their kids. by the time I was 16 I knew what my boundaries were. I never had a curfew in my life because by that time there was a trust built up

two families in our area had kids near my age or my brother's age...they were both the beating kind of parents...both have had one or more of their kids arrested or in drug rehab or kicked out of college. the sad part is that the parents think my mom and dad "got lucky" that we were so well behaved. just turns out the parents were too stupid to know how to raise a kid (and these were upper middle class people with good jobs...just dumb about life)

[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 2:11 PM. Reason : .]

8/13/2009 2:10:46 PM

Quote :

"Makes the "This is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you." seem legit, huh?"

well, i spanked his ass (he's 4-1/2) because he started kicking me. and i know half of you people are gonna say some shit like, "hell yeah, i'd beat my kids ass for hitting/kicking me"

... but the whole thing seems counter productive to tell a 4 year old that hitting is wrong, and to prove it, i'm gonna hit him as punishment for hitting .... it's just fucked up to even try and rationalize it.

so of course he cried, and had a red handprint on his ass, and my wife was upset, and all that jazz.

but on the other hand, i'll be damned if i'm going to have a kid who thinks it's okay to hit his mom and dad when he's mad about something.

Dilemma.




[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 2:11 PM. Reason : ]

8/13/2009 2:11:05 PM

Quote :

"but on the other hand, i'll be damned if i'm going to have a kid who thinks it's okay to hit his mom and dad when he's mad about something."

Quote :

"... but the whole thing seems counter productive to tell a 4 year old that hitting is wrong, and to prove it, i'm gonna hit him as punishment for hitting .... it's just fucked up to even try and rationalize it."

If you're gonna spank him, don't present it as 'it's not okay to hit'. Present it as 'we're your parents, and that is inappropriate and disrespectful behavior for which you should expect severe consequences'

8/13/2009 2:12:56 PM

my mother says she beat me often but i don't remember them...

possibly because she is very heavy handed.

8/13/2009 2:13:14 PM

^^ hmmm... okay, maybe i can go with that. you make it sound so simple



[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 2:17 PM. Reason : ]

8/13/2009 2:15:55 PM

Quote :

"haha i'm going to be a terrible parent. I'd probably reward this."

Don;t worry - no one will fuck you anyway.

8/13/2009 2:22:12 PM

Quote :

"if my child was as stupid i wouldnt call either"

Dumbass, they call me all the time and I let it go to voicemail.

I am the one not calling them.

They know I don't have their cell phone #s stored in my phone and will sometimes call me from those.

8/13/2009 2:30:49 PM

Quote :

"my parents whooped my ass with a leather belt. i finally got old enough to where i didn't cry when they did it and they stopped."

same here. stopped after age 12

8/13/2009 2:33:41 PM

seriously lewoods

you need a hug.

[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 2:35 PM. Reason : my mom was an expert at verbal punishment. definitely the scarier of the 2 bless her heart]

8/13/2009 2:33:57 PM

Quote :

"my parents whooped my ass with a leather belt. i finally got old enough to where i didn't cry when they did it and they stopped."

and yeah, I hate spanking my daughter. I've only done it a few times, and it's usually not hard enough to hurt much (partially because I don't want to accidentally overdo it on a little girl, and partially because I can usually get her attention with a medium-duty swat). I'll make it sting if I have to, and I'm sure I eventually will, but I'd rather avoid that. I'd rather her listen to me and do the right things because she wants to.

8/13/2009 2:38:46 PM

^ My sister has gotten more spankings than all three (3) of her brothers. She's hardheaded.

[Edited on August 13, 2009 at 2:43 PM. Reason : -]

8/13/2009 2:42:42 PM

my s-i-l describes how her parents gave her a choice growing up. it was either the belt, or no TV. her sister would chose no TV, and my s-i-l would chose the belt every time

she's like, "My ass was sore, but hey I got to watch Eurkel!"

8/13/2009 2:58:50 PM

I got the wooden spoon treatment as a kid

But one day, when ma dukes was the grocery store.....i propped every single one of them against the couch and pulled out every karate move in my repertoire.....then shoved the broken remnants under the couch. I felt like I was on top of the world

8/13/2009 3:03:00 PM

I got spanked a few times, no doubt for some stupid shit, but I can't remember exactly what. Eventually, my parents figured out that taking away Playstation/PC was a far more effective disciplinary tool than physical pain, at least for me.

8/13/2009 3:06:44 PM

jsut a few moments ago, i was in the local coffee shop, enjoying a chai latte with the lady friend. a few tables over sat a pair of young mothers, i'm guessing mid twenties, well-dressed, probably stay-at-home moms, with a pair of little brats i reckon to have been about three or four years old. now, the little brats, god bless 'em, were bored with their mommies' conversation, so they were amusing themselves by trying to get the chocolate-coated espresso beans out of the little bubble-gum type vending machine. of course, being four years old, these little brats were not being subtle in their endeavors. their primary method seemed to be pushing the little vending machine against the wall behind it, while shrieking and squealing and generally causing a stir in what is usually a quiet little coffee shop. the mother of one would occasionally look at her little brat and say, "ethan, will you stop that, please? don't do that, please," while the other glanced over and said, "brooklyn, leave the machine alone. do you want to watch dora later? you won't get to watch dora if you don't leave the machine alone."
neither child stopped.
finally, the young mothers left and took their brats with them. "finally," i thought to myself, "i can actually enjoy the chai and the conversation." just as i was thinking this, however, another young mother walks in with her fussy little brat. while this young mother is ordering her coffee, her little one starts the same routine with the espresso-bean-gumball-machine. however, instead of politely asking her child to stop, or making threats which went unheeded, this particular young mother said to her child, "michael, do we need to go to the bathroom?" in a tone that indicated that michael knew exactly what would happen if his mother had to take him to the bathroom.
little michael didn't mess with the machine any more.

8/13/2009 3:20:47 PM

yeah it's the "do we need to go the bathroom?" type stuff that did me after the one spanking...parents that PUT THE FEAR IN YOU

8/13/2009 3:23:10 PM

Quote :

"i guess i got spanked a few times (like maybe 3 times)...when i got caught stealing candy from the local store, I had to pay them $100 with my $5 a week allowance...when I lost a new watch in the woods, I had to buy a new one with my allowance..."

what's an allowance?

when my sister was bad, my parents would threaten to whip me if she acted up again.

8/13/2009 3:29:03 PM

I'd get the flyswatter. If I was especially bad they'd turn it around and use the wire end.

8/13/2009 3:29:49 PM

leather belt from dad in my family

8/13/2009 3:32:48 PM

i got the 2x4 treatment and my brother also did plenty of times for what seemed like no reason. mom liked the plug end of an electrical cord. mom tried that shit on me one time when i was in college and i punched her in the face.

8/13/2009 3:33:55 PM

lol gg

8/13/2009 3:35:53 PM

Quote :

"my s-i-l describes how her parents gave her a choice growing up. it was either the belt, or no TV. her sister would chose no TV, and my s-i-l would chose the belt every time she's like, "My ass was sore, but hey I got to watch Eurkel!""

After a time, my parents resorted to this...and then this + physical punishments. There are SO many TV shows I never saw because I was permanently forbidden TV. They finally found something that straightened me out with a relative quickness: taking away my reading privileges. I'd get so hard up for words (seriously, I felt addicted and incomplete unless I was reading. In middle school, I'd walk through the very, very crowded halls between classes with my nose in a book.) that I'd linger over breakfast so I could re-read (again) the ingredients list and other words on food packaging. Ditto in the shower. They wised up to this, though

Quote :

"^ My sister has gotten more spankings than all three (3) of her brothers. She's hardheaded. "

My sister got spanked when she was a toddler, and that was about it. She's pretty hard-headed, but nothing compared to me. She's pretty much always behaved, especially after seeing how creative my parents got with punishments.

Quote :

" "michael, do we need to go to the bathroom?" in a tone that indicated that michael knew exactly what would happen if his mother had to take him to the bathroom. little michael didn't mess with the machine any more."

I forget what store I was in, but a mother was ahead of me (and a few other folks) with a very, very bratty kid in a long line. She gave him two chances with this line, dropped her stuff to the side, took him outside, and came back in a few minutes later with a crying, but quiet, kid. Everyone pushed her to the head of the line.

I've posted in the workplace annoyances thread about parents using the "[kid], please..." line. A parent should never, ever use "please" when telling their child what to do. If you're the parent, you should act like a fucking parent; namely, always maintaining unquestionable control and authority in the interactions. Fuck this "please" bullshit /willnilly

Quote :

"yeah it's the "do we need to go the bathroom?" type stuff that did me after the one spanking...parents that PUT THE FEAR IN YOU "

My mom would always count. "1...2...". I almost always stopped at 1, rarely pushed her to 2, and only once did I say "3" for her.

Quote :

"i got the 2x4 treatment and my brother also did plenty of times for what seemed like no reason. mom liked the plug end of an electrical cord. mom tried that shit on me one time when i was in college and i punched her in the face."

Some time in elementary school, I retaliated once towards my mother (never did towards my dad). I don't remember my attempt too well, but I remember the consequences. I want to say I grabbed her hand while she was trying to swat me (for something minor, no less). She grabbed me by my hair, pulled my head down to the ground, and beat the everloving shit out of my rear with her hand/fist. It wasn't sharp pain like most of my spankings (with the paddle), but left me aching for days. I was absolutely horrified. I loved her too much to ever try and bite her or punch her or (think I could) inflict any real pain. After that, I never thought about retaliating again.

I did, during the manic psychotic periods immediately before a hospitalization, try to stab my sister once, often throw small shit at my mom (like shoes), and when dad would physically restrain me after stunts like that, punch at whatever I could get to, and bite the same. Mostly because I was off my damn rockers, not out of any sense of retaliation.

8/13/2009 4:33:41 PM

Gett off the "It's not ok to hit" rhetoric at all. Definitely teach your kids that hitting is not a good first or second option, but sometimes it IS ok to hit.

Hitting your parents on the other hand, that's never ok, as is exemplified by the fact that you get an as whoopin if you try

8/13/2009 4:53:19 PM

My mom once beat me with a piece of a Hot Wheels race track, on advice from another mother. She felt so bad that she never hit me again, although she did considerable emotional damage, which is far more permanent.

8/13/2009 4:54:54 PM

what started out as a parody, has turned into a quality thread.

gg

8/13/2009 4:58:35 PM

my husband had a completely different experience. as a toddler, his mother slapped his hand once and he started laughing at her. he was never punished physically again and was an angel for the rest of his life. obviously hitting didnt help a lot of us since we continued to act up. and apparently parents dont know when to stop. when your child is as big as you are, you cant keep hitting them. its retarded. my brother had to throw my dad into a wall to get him to quit beating him. im going to try my best to never physically punish any children i become responsible for in the future.

8/13/2009 5:04:28 PM

This is like the beginnings of a Linkin Park EP.

8/13/2009 5:04:32 PM

Quote :

"when your child is as big as you are, you cant keep hitting them"

Bullshit.

Quote :

" im going to try my best to never physically punish any children i become responsible for in the future."

Hey, at least you recognize that it has value, unlike so many people who say "I WILL NEVAR..."

8/13/2009 5:06:06 PM

wood spoon on the hands

8/13/2009 5:18:34 PM

I was spanked a good bit, usually with a belt or switch. Some of the time I deserved, the other times my mom and aunt were being bitches who blamed us for eating into their good years.

8/13/2009 5:35:49 PM

I was never really beaten by my parents, but having a teacher for a mother meant a having someone who knew how to deal with & preempt shenanigans. And my dad having been in the military was at least symbolically a force for order.

I was told if I ever want to drink go ahead, but they'd prefer I do it at home & my 'rents will buy the beer & I could invite my friends over. They'd rather me do it there. To this day I barely ever drink.

I was told if I want a tattoo, they will take me to get one. I think this offer was made in middle school & in high school. Same thing for a piercing. To this day I have no piercings or tattoos.

I was told if I ever want to skip class, go a head, but it'll just be that much more catch up work I'll have to do for having missed. I had more years with perfect attendance than not from Kindergarten through graduating college. No real curfew either. But doing well in school was always its own motivator because it was the only way I was ever getting out of my small town (Mt Airy aka Mayberry).

My parents managed to get me to understand early on that good behavior is in my own self interest, and at the same time take the cool out of doing any of the things that the other kids were banned from doing.

8/13/2009 6:00:18 PM

i think you're like a cross between Ralph Wiggins and Rod Flanders.

and maybe something else... i can't quite put my finger on it.

8/13/2009 6:02:48 PM

I was once punished by having the super nintendo placed on the highest shelf in the house, along with all the cables and controllers. I stacked a few chairs to climb up and get it after school and hooked it back up to the TV including the RF switch. I think I got forced to do extra chores after that. I was really mean to mom one day and dad laid me down and spanked me across his knee. I then had the fear.

Grandma beat me with a flyswatter when I cursed in front of her once, and beat me with a switch she had handy because I did something else stupid. Grandma.

My cousin pushed my aunt really far one day and she paddled him with a ping-pong ball paddle and broke it on his ass. He was wearing those nylon type soccer shorts and a long and wide splinter from the paddle pinned them to his ass. He turned around and looked at the bloody splinter and squawked, "Mama! Look what you did!" All my other cousins in attendance and myself started laughing pretty hard.

I think it's worse to yell at children than to beat them.

8/13/2009 6:33:53 PM

how dare qntmthief steal my thunder


I'm AstralAdvent and i approved this message.

9/28/2009 12:21:04 PM