1) Having a lady-friend convince my brother and her mom that I got her pregnant and that I don't know about it yet.

3/20/2008 1:35:01 PM

Nice.

3/20/2008 1:36:12 PM

place: the mojave desert
temp: hot as hell's oven on bread day
the gag: so there are these crystals miner's used to use in their helmet lanterns that catch fire when they are dowsed in water and lit with a lighter...imagine having 25 grown men crawling around looking for 'magic rocks' on april fools day in the middle of the desert, spitting on the rocks they find and trying to light them

3/20/2008 1:39:15 PM

what the fuck is bread day in hell?

3/20/2008 1:40:44 PM

in hell's kitchen they have bread day, alright?

3/20/2008 1:42:06 PM

^^^lol

3/20/2008 1:42:31 PM

Me and my gf are gonna change our status on facebook to be engaged. Won't do much for me, but just about her whole family is on facebook. That's all I've really got right now.

3/20/2008 1:49:34 PM

^
Its a trap

3/20/2008 1:50:07 PM

Quote :

"Me and my gf are gonna change our status on facebook to be engaged. Won't do much for me, but just about her whole family is on facebook. That's all I've really got right now."

We were going to end our relationship on facebook

3/20/2008 2:13:02 PM

Steal your best bro's cell phone and call his girl.

Girl: Hello? (Or maybe, "Hi, sweetie!" Whatever.)

You: Yes, is this [girl's name]?

G: Yes....

Y: I'm Officer Douglas with the RPD. We just recovered this phone from the scene of a fatal crash, and you were listed as the ICE* number.

G: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

*In Case of Emergency

3/20/2008 2:15:27 PM

I'm just gonna btt the 'Scarlett Johansson finally freed dem titties" thread.

3/20/2008 2:18:30 PM

Stuff two pounds of raw ground chuck in a child's Converse and leave it in the Burger King drive-thru.

3/20/2008 2:25:09 PM

peanut butter jar half full of milk - add 1 raw drumstick - screw cap on one twist - hide behind someone's couch (you really have to hate the person you're doing this to, btw)...a few days later, the gases inside the jar pop the top off, and the smell of death comes wafting out...if left unchecked over a weekend, the victim will have to replace teh carpet and paint to get rid of the smell.

3/20/2008 2:28:36 PM

joke had to be canceled....

3/30/2008 7:39:29 PM

april fools is on the same list as st patricks day as far as i'm concerned

3/30/2008 7:45:50 PM

http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/news/2007/03/aprilfools0329

Quote :

"Once a year, we get to take advantage of our non-geek friends' and co-workers' flimsy grasp on technology. The best geek pranks involve making a gadget or a piece of software appear "broken." Since the tech savvy will quickly notice these pranks, they are best performed on the inept, the perpetually preoccupied and the woefully unaware. I'd recommend starting with the suits in marketing or the over-50 guy who refers to his workstation as his "confuser." Actually, anyone who frequently steps away from his or her desk for any more than 90 seconds should be considered fair game. Vote for your favorite pranks and add your own. Also, since you can swoop in and come to the rescue of a co-worker stranded in technological hell, pranks make great ice-breakers. Try these on the new girl in sales -- you'll be her knight in shining Linux T-shirt. April Fool's Day falls on a Sunday this year, which is a day off for most of us. But don't let that little technicality stop you. It's the spirit that counts. One thing you should definitely not do is break anything. Only make the device appear broken. The point when the joke can't be reversed is also the point it ceases to be funny. Trust me. Switch Their Keyboard to Dvorak The only reason people use the antiquated QWERTY keyboard layout is because they've never experienced the power and flexibility of Dr. August Dvorak's simplified eponymous layout. Make it your job to school these people. Yd.f-nn ydabt frg nay.p To switch a keyboard layout in Windows XP, go to the Control Panel (make sure it's in "Classic View" mode) and click on Regional and Language Options. Under the Languages tab, view Details. Click on Add and find "United States-Dvorak" in the list. Now you'll see Dvorak show up in the drop-down menu of default input languages. Choose it and click Apply. Mac OS X is much easier: Go to System Preferences, click on International and select the Input Menu tab. Click the checkbox next to Dvorak. You might also check "Show input menu in menu bar" at the bottom of the window. A tiny icon menu will appear in the top right corner (next to the clock), allowing you to switch between keyboard layouts with a single click. Put the Mac to Bed Newer Apple hardware comes with that cute little Front Row remote. Use it for pure evil by randomly putting the prankee's Mac to sleep. Perfect for Starbucks! Any Front Row remote will work (just hold down the Play button for a few seconds) as long as the person hasn't disabled the remote sleep option or paired a specific remote with their machine. But who does that? New Key Layout Manually rearrange keyboard keys with a Keycap Puller. Swapping letter keys only works on noob hunter-peckers, but you can still prank everyone else by reversing their 10-key keypad. When reversed, it looks just like a telephone, so they won't notice anything is amiss until they start typing numbers. 4. Blue Screen of Death Install the Blue Screen of Death screen saver. When the screen goes to sleep, the machine looks like it crashed. Be mindful the victim might lose data if they pull the plug. Mangle the Mouse Hide the mouse ball. It sounds far too simple to actually fool anyone, but you'll be amazed at how long people will curse and slam their unresponsive mouse onto the desktop before actually flipping the thing over. On the bottom of most mice, you'll find a plastic ring encircling the ball. Loosen it with a twist and pop the ball out. Dropping the mouse ball into their coffee cup will render it magically invisible. Berlitz the Phone Change their mobile phone's language setting to Spanish. Almost every modern phone sold in the United States has English and Spanish as the two selectable languages. The setting is usually pretty easy to find in the menus, too. You Canadians should choose French, unless of course you're in Quebec where everyone speaks both French and English (in which case you're totalement vissé). Look Closely What's wrong with this picture? Twitter Dicker Everyone on Twitter has an RSS feed, setting the stage perfectly for some micro-mayhem. Create a Twitter account, get your friend to subscribe to it, then put their Twitter feed through a tool like rss2twitter. It publishes any RSS feed through your Twitter account, so whenever your friend posts, they'll see their own Twitters echoing back at them. Po-tweet? So it goes. Right Is Left Go into their mouse settings and swap the mouse buttons. Set left-click as right-click and vice versa. This one is so simple, it's best reserved for the truly helpless. While you're at it, slow down the double-click speed to add an extra helping of annoyance. Prank Calls Via the Web Use the web to reach out and touch some one. Nice Wallpaper Take a screenshot of your friend's desktop and make it their desktop wallpaper. Minimize any open applications and hide all of the desktop icons or ferret them away in a folder -- don't delete anything. Then, set the Windows taskbar to auto-hide. Go to Control Panel, click on Taskbar & Start Menu then choose "Auto hide." On a Mac OS X machine, go into System Preferences, click on Dock and choose "Automatically hide and show Dock." Hang out somewhere close by so you can hear the frustrated clicking grow louder and more urgent. Early Birds Welcome Every year April 1 falls on a weekend presents a perfect opportunity to dust off an old favorite. Set up a fake garage sale post on Craigslist. Sat it starts at 7a.m. "Early birds welcome!" "

my favorite will be dvorak!

[Edited on March 31, 2008 at 1:54 PM. Reason : favorite]

3/31/2008 1:53:31 PM

run into class screaming that China just bombed Hawaii

3/31/2008 3:55:34 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UcoJs5EVrF0

3/31/2008 5:09:12 PM

f.ad yday eprkat ydcbi co lp.yyf ugbbf

(yeah that drovak thing is pretty funny)

3/31/2008 5:14:26 PM

mix up fake blood

cough alot into a handkerchief and exclaim

"blood, i've coughed up blood, i think i have tuberclulosis the consumption"

3/31/2008 5:48:19 PM

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/activision_reports_sluggish_sales

3/31/2008 8:14:31 PM

triangleweb.com!

4/1/2008 12:03:35 AM

triangleweb.com!

4/1/2008 12:04:08 AM

triangleweb.com!

4/1/2008 12:05:48 AM

http://www.collegehumor.com

um...yea..

4/1/2008 1:25:42 AM

Quote :

"We were going to end our relationship on facebook "

We've had tons of people talking to each of us about our ended relationship. Lot's of mixed emotions. I've been hit on by a girl. We'll see what happens later today.

4/1/2008 1:27:41 AM

Call Ex-girlfriend
Talk about getting back
APRIL FOOLS BITCH
*Click*

4/1/2008 1:28:54 AM

Quote :

" Right Is Left Go into their mouse settings and swap the mouse buttons. Set left-click as right-click and vice versa. This one is so simple, it's best reserved for the truly helpless. While you're at it, slow down the double-click speed to add an extra helping of annoyance. "

Will test on lab computers today...

4/1/2008 1:34:34 AM

http://mail.google.com/mail/help/customtime/index.html

Quote :

"Introducing Gmail Custom TimeTM Be on time. Every time.* How do I use it? Just click "Set custom time" from the Compose view. Any email you send to the past appears in the proper chronological order in your recipient's inbox. You can opt for it to show up read or unread by selecting the appropriate option. Is there a limit to how far back I can send email? Yes. You'll only be able to send email back until April 1, 2004, the day we launched Gmail. If we were to let you send an email from Gmail before Gmail existed, well, that would be like hanging out with your parents before you were born -- crazy talk. How does it work? Gmail utilizes an e-flux capacitor to resolve issues of causality (see Grandfather Paradox). How come I only get ten? Our researchers have concluded that allowing each person more than ten pre-dated emails per year would cause people to lose faith in the accuracy of time, thus rendering the feature useless. Their findings: [(N X P) - Vf ]/ L = 10 N = Total emails sent P = Probability that user believes the time stamp f = The Golden Ratio L = Average life expectancy "

4/1/2008 1:39:47 AM

lol

4/1/2008 6:00:37 AM

I'm going to tell my parents I got a job.

4/1/2008 6:17:39 AM

my mom sent me an email this morning and i replied to it....not sure if that counts

4/1/2008 6:18:31 AM

^AHAHAHAHAHA

4/1/2008 6:19:29 AM

i got hit.

4/1/2008 7:08:25 AM

Quote :

"Mangle the Mouse Hide the mouse ball. It sounds far too simple to actually fool anyone, but you'll be amazed at how long people will curse and slam their unresponsive mouse onto the desktop before actually flipping the thing over. On the bottom of most mice, you'll find a plastic ring encircling the ball. Loosen it with a twist and pop the ball out. Dropping the mouse ball into their coffee cup will render it magically invisible."

In other news...

Man Chokes on Mouse Ball, Hilarity Does Not Ensue

[Edited on April 1, 2008 at 7:19 AM. Reason : b]

4/1/2008 7:18:43 AM

april fools day jokes are retarded

4/1/2008 8:20:13 AM

who the hell has a mouse with a ball anymore?

4/1/2008 8:21:21 AM

i called my dad and told him i was gay

i didn't have time to say april fools before he hung up and killed himself

4/1/2008 8:28:22 AM

Quote :

"who the hell has a mouse with a ball anymore?"

4/1/2008 11:06:43 AM

we've had a rather unpleasant stench in the office for the past few weeks. my coworker dumped all the paper out of the shredding bin and got inside. i got another coworker and told her, "i think i know where it's coming from--i was in the mail room and tracked the smell to the paper bin. it looks like someone threw something away in there and now it's all rotting and gross...come look."

she walks over there with me, opens the lid, and my coworker pops out

harmless, but it scared the begeesus out of her and we all got a good laugh

[Edited on April 1, 2008 at 11:13 AM. Reason : ]

4/1/2008 11:11:48 AM

good god LK
how big is your shredder

4/1/2008 2:50:19 PM

the bin we put our paper in is the same size at the city trash cans...it fits one adult

4/1/2008 4:26:00 PM

Yep, I just changed my facebook status to engaged to a girl went to HS with.

4/1/2008 5:02:13 PM