Liquor manufacturers have accepted the Government's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~***WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. A little additional alcohol will lead to believe you are bullet proof.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, leaving you unable to account for large chunks of time.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~WARNING: The crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you kan tpye reel gode
5/30/2008 12:15:10 PM
thanks for posting old ass email forwards!
5/30/2008 12:15:55 PM
5/30/2008 12:17:01 PM