so i was in a study room. studying. when a black dude ~ 30 yrs old walks in and sits down across from me and starts to read a financial magazine.
i go on with my work until about 10 minutes later when i start hearing NOISES.
oh yeah, he's fucking jerkin it under the table WHILE I AM STUDYING.
so i freaked out, which freaked him out and caused him to try and get up. i went to the front desk lady and told her and she was like "OMG, we've been getting reports of that for the last week or so, but we can't do anything unless we catch him in the act."
What. the. fuck.

anyway, moral of the story, stay the hell away from study rooms with creepy fuckers in them.

5/31/2008 1:09:09 PM

If I was you I would be flattered.

5/31/2008 1:11:28 PM

useless without pics

5/31/2008 1:12:21 PM

Just be glad he didn't beat off onto your shoe in DH Hill.

5/31/2008 1:15:31 PM

SRSLY!??


wow...i'd be FREAKING out.


and...

Quote :

"starts to read a financial magazine look at gay porn"

[Edited on May 31, 2008 at 1:21 PM. Reason : j]

5/31/2008 1:20:41 PM

well the first thing you did wrong was go to cameron village library when dh hill is open

5/31/2008 1:21:26 PM

Quote :

"she was like "OMG, we've been getting reports of that for the last week or so, but we can't do anything unless we catch him in the act.""

The hell they can't.

5/31/2008 1:21:53 PM

^ that's what i thought! they should be able to file some sort of report.

5/31/2008 1:23:38 PM

wouldnt have guessed the name "redstapler" was a female

5/31/2008 1:24:14 PM

why

5/31/2008 1:26:00 PM

look, I didn't mean to freak you out. I just thought you were cute. My apologies.
Can't we just get past this without any legal action? Please?

5/31/2008 1:26:53 PM

idk sounds kinda more like a dudes name i guess...i was wondering why blas said the "flattering" thing....then i noticed you used "!" which is a dead giveaway in a thread like this

5/31/2008 1:27:03 PM

on a related note....

http://news.enquirer.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/AB/20080529/NEWS0107/305290057/

Quote :

"A Columbus man has been charged with crawling under a table at a library on University of Cincinnati’s campus, spraying a substance from a syringe on a woman’s shoes and then photographing them. Dwight Pannell, 43, was booked into the county jail about midnight on charges of voyeurism, assault and criminal trespass, court records show. In court this afternoon, Pannell was silent and kept his back mostly turned to reporters. His lawyer argued that Pannell’s alleged actions didn’t seem to warrant the charges against him. ADVERTISEMENT Pannell is accused of sprinkling water on a woman’s foot, Pannell’s attorney said, and “how that can be an assault, I don’t know.” Municipal Court Judge Dwane Mallory set Pannell’s bond at $75,000. “There’s really no way to explain people’s fetishes,” said University of Cincinnati Police Capt. Karen Patterson this morning. “I’ve been in police work 24 years and I can’t explain it. I don’t know. It would take a psychologist or psychiatrist to explain it.” The woman, a UC student, told police she was in the Langsam Library on Woodside Drive about 9 p.m. Wednesday when she spotted a suspicious-looking man walking around, records state. Then, she heard a noise coming from under her table and felt something cold on her feet. “When I looked down, the person was on his knee with the syringe,” she wrote in an affidavit filed with the court. She immediately knew the man under her table was responsible for putting some sort of watery substance on her shoes, she wrote. She ran for help to the person next to her, and he told her to go downstairs and tell security. “Apparently, she did right thing,” Patterson said of the woman. “As soon as she felt something, she got up and ran away and contacted the police so we were able to catch him. It doesn’t appear there was any other victim.” UC police arrested Pannell at the library and seized his camera, Patterson said. He told police he was visiting the library and trying out his new camera. Police found images of the woman’s feet on it. “He admitted taking pictures of her feet,” Patterson said. “He said he was doing so because it was a new camera.” They also confiscated the syringe and plan to have its contents tested. The UC incident was not Pannell's first problem in a library. According to a July 18, 2000, story in the Enquirer, Pannell was accused of attacking a woman with a syringe at Ohio State University's main library. He was charged with assault and possession of criminal tools. The woman was treated at an area hospital and released"

5/31/2008 1:29:37 PM

omg it's him!!!!!

jk. but that's really gross.

^^dnl... my name is ALICE, it even says so on my profile. besides alice cooper, do you know any other male alices!?

5/31/2008 1:37:25 PM

no ma'am, but i dont know many chicks that would pick redstapler as their handle

5/31/2008 1:38:16 PM

who says handle?

5/31/2008 1:40:42 PM

Quote :

"voyeurism"

que?

5/31/2008 1:43:19 PM

^^i've seen at least like 4 users say it before

[Edited on May 31, 2008 at 1:43 PM. Reason : .]

5/31/2008 1:43:21 PM

when i was a freshman, i loved office space. and i needed to make a tww account. and office space was on. and so i picked it.
good story right?

5/31/2008 1:46:30 PM

so are you single and or wanna go on a date sometime in july?

[Edited on May 31, 2008 at 1:47 PM. Reason : .]

5/31/2008 1:47:04 PM

that is gross, one of the many things most people are not ready to confront

http://youtube.com/watch?v=bI55ie5Eo7E&feature=related

5/31/2008 1:49:45 PM

Since this is T-dub and all, maybe the thread title should have started with be aware instead of beware.

Some chicks on here might try to score some alone time with this guy.

5/31/2008 1:56:26 PM

wow i like how DNL just asks people on dates right in the middle of the thread for sometime a few months from now

5/31/2008 1:57:55 PM

that's weird that you like that. It'd freak me out a little. whatever floats yer boat

5/31/2008 3:01:55 PM

This dude seriously looks like a cartoon elephant.

[Edited on May 31, 2008 at 3:07 PM. Reason : image]

5/31/2008 3:06:56 PM

CV what what

5/31/2008 3:23:27 PM

He is the poster child for a pear shaped head.

5/31/2008 3:28:53 PM

she said no

5/31/2008 3:33:18 PM

Quote :

"that's weird that you like that. It'd freak me out a little. whatever floats yer boat "

haha...i see what you did there fermat

5/31/2008 5:15:09 PM

Quote :

"If I was you I would be flattered."

If I were you, I'd use subjunctive.

5/31/2008 5:21:21 PM

5/31/2008 6:22:06 PM

AHHAHA

5/31/2008 6:22:27 PM

^^ Should say "WAT?"

5/31/2008 10:10:07 PM

Quote :

"If I were you, I'd use subjunctive."

grammar-nazi shawna is my favorite one

5/31/2008 10:16:15 PM

if you saw him then you caught him in the act...call the police. He will be arrested if you stick around and give a statement to the police and if they catch him still in the building.

5/31/2008 11:04:07 PM

^^so are you saying that of the grammar nazis, Shawna is your favorite?


or


of all the versions of Shawna, the grammar nazi is your favorite?

6/1/2008 1:00:28 AM

you are considered one of the grammar nazis?

6/1/2008 1:01:00 AM

Anyone who corrects someone else's grammar is, in fact, a grammar nazi.

6/1/2008 1:27:49 AM

Oh man, that guy's picture is great! Haha...

That almost deserves its own thread.

Yeah though, the freakout thing was probably the BEST THING you could've done to that guy as far as ruining his jerkoff experience.

The library definitely could've called the fucking cops. I'm sure they could've escorted the guy off the property and given him a warning (and if he runs... taser taser taser!).

6/1/2008 1:34:32 AM

^^fair, enough shawna, fair enough

6/1/2008 1:36:00 AM

I'm about to become a grammar nazi.

6/1/2008 1:39:59 AM

Your first order of business: correct dnl's comma usage in the post prior to yours.

6/1/2008 1:44:19 AM

^^fair enough shawna fair enough,,


?

6/1/2008 1:45:33 AM

You suck at grammar.

6/1/2008 1:48:35 AM

I agree with DnL, ENOUGH SHAWNA!

6/1/2008 1:50:03 AM

lawl


there's never enough shawna

6/1/2008 1:50:30 AM

tww has reached an optimum level of shawna.

6/1/2008 1:56:01 AM

It only took almost 7 years.

6/1/2008 1:56:25 AM

ummm, modifiers.

6/1/2008 2:02:58 AM

WHAT YOU SAY?

6/1/2008 2:03:58 AM