just moved in last night. fucking HAWT. her names Ashley. she's a student at the local community college (Miami-Dade). lives with her mum. i let her use my parking space last night. i gave her a business card.

what's the best way to bwn your 20 year old neighbor routinely?

6/1/2008 9:20:45 AM

pics or stfu

6/1/2008 9:30:23 AM

send her a smiley face

6/1/2008 9:30:38 AM

my nig, i thought you were gonna stop being a whore

6/1/2008 9:31:32 AM

i know, but this chick was so sexy.

god ! i want to poke her pie.

she's like 5'7" with a small gap between her teeth.

i love sh!t like that.

then and a nice set of "real" bewbs.

great ass . . . slim waist. nice face.

god ! i want to poke her pie.

6/1/2008 9:34:10 AM

form working relationship with her and ask her out?

6/1/2008 9:35:58 AM

smart move. i told her she could you my space and offered her mum help moving some stuff.

6/1/2008 9:42:31 AM

i thought you normally just drugged them. why would this be any different

6/1/2008 9:43:15 AM

make up a really good story and then post it on TWW

oh waiit......

6/1/2008 9:47:08 AM

let it be known that you can be her source of weed (or other drug of choice)

she'll let you fuck her pie

6/1/2008 9:49:36 AM

she's like a Latin Lauren Hutton. (i probably should ask if she's latin, i even got confused for being latin here. everybody just assumes you're spanish regardless of you skin tone. it's odd). but again, i've never met a latin chick that didn't swallow.

i bet she's got a nice pie.

don't know what i'm going to tell my Babe.

hopefully, she approves. if not, ............. ? i dunno.

6/1/2008 9:50:23 AM

Quote :

"let it be known that you can be her source of weed "

i pray she smokes bud.

6/1/2008 9:51:15 AM

i think it'd be pretty fucked up to routinely bang your 20 year old neighbor.

6/1/2008 10:32:00 AM

you SERIOUSLY don't have pics and expect people to read this shit?

6/1/2008 10:35:52 AM

^^ thats exactly why you don't have a penis.

6/1/2008 10:46:40 AM

Quote :

"what's the best way to bwn your 20 year old neighbor routinely?"

It's be hard, especaially with her living with her mom. (unless you sling the mom some too)

Fucking the neighbor never works out, especially considering her age. Eventually she will get attached, and when you bring other girls home she'll turn psycho. Speaking from experience, of course.

6/1/2008 10:49:51 AM

Start bwning the neighbor but be cool and flirty with the mom. Eventually you'll get her too.

6/1/2008 10:53:57 AM

Giving a business card to a new girl you just met is about as pretentiously lame as you can be.

poor move, sir

6/1/2008 10:56:03 AM

^ I dunno dude, she's only 20. She might have been impressed with the fact that he had a good job and was established.

6/1/2008 10:57:27 AM

send her a link to this thread.

6/1/2008 11:53:03 AM

send her a poke on facebook
that always works for me

6/1/2008 11:59:34 AM

come on, he's not even trying anymore

6/1/2008 12:00:13 PM

rule of thumb

let your prey facebook you first

otherwise it looks stalkerish

6/1/2008 12:00:44 PM

if you can post here and a stupid fucking blog and do all the other things a techie person can do, why can'y you learn to use a FUCKING CAMERA?

6/1/2008 1:12:13 PM

why the fuck would he do that

6/1/2008 1:15:14 PM

oh yea, then he'd have to go /b/ on us and write on his face with a marker to prove it's him

6/1/2008 1:16:45 PM

Quote :

"with a small gap between her teeth. i love sh!t like that."

did nobody catch this gem?

6/1/2008 1:17:47 PM

it's not a gem
he picked it up somewhere else

6/1/2008 1:18:24 PM

Quote :

" god ! i want to poke her pie"

6/1/2008 1:31:33 PM

Quote :

"Giving a business card to a new girl you just met is about as pretentiously lame as you can be."

i've always known that to be lame, but i did it cause we're neighbors ... i hope it wasn't a douchery move ....

6/1/2008 1:38:38 PM

if i assume you are a normal person for a second:

business card = odd cause you live next door

6/1/2008 1:45:13 PM

why do people continue to believe this guy is a real person?

6/1/2008 2:02:20 PM

honestly I just don't care

what most people post here is biased to the point of being nearly complete fiction anyway

if they manage to achieve the cohesive characterization of a non-existent personality with that fiction it's at no expense to comedy and drama

6/1/2008 2:52:03 PM

ok, I shit a dinosaur egg last night and killed it with a bicycle chain as it hatched. Greatest story ever!

6/1/2008 2:53:30 PM

you should have tried to fuck it first.

6/1/2008 3:09:02 PM

FUCKING DIE

6/1/2008 3:26:39 PM

Quote :

"you should have tried to fuck it first."

Seriously, G. What I've noticed since I moved to Miami is that out here b!tches really want dick. Not to sound crass, but the women here are more sexual then I've seen anywhere. You can have a regular night of just going to a bar and next thing you know its a fucking freakfest. Or you meet a chick thats normal and then you're getting the head of your life. But I'm just a pious, respectful motherfucker, you know, G. so I pass on a lot of pussy if it isn't presented well. but who knows, B . . . . but as I recall 20 year old trim was nice and taste like grey poupon.

i want to pipe it G. bottom line.

6/1/2008 3:32:28 PM

I meant he should have tried to fuck the dinosaur.

6/1/2008 3:38:14 PM

Are all packed for jail? Maybe she can come visit you?

6/1/2008 3:40:33 PM

it'd work better if you hadn't fucked up that sentence

6/1/2008 3:41:30 PM

two $20 dollars money.

6/1/2008 4:26:50 PM

bitches love smiley faces.

6/1/2008 4:39:07 PM

190%

6/1/2008 4:40:00 PM

you got some life going on there, B

[Edited on June 1, 2008 at 5:50 PM. Reason : on]

6/1/2008 5:49:51 PM