User not logged in - login - register
Home Calendar Books School Tool Photo Gallery Message Boards Users Statistics Advertise Site Info
go to bottom | |
 Message Boards » » my cat is in heat v3.0 Page [1]  
paerabol
All American
17118 Posts
user info
edit post

yup-- she's at it again.


1/14/2010 12:44:28 PM

craptastic
All American
6116 Posts
user info
edit post

GET YO CAT SPAYED

1/14/2010 2:17:22 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
user info
edit post

1/14/2010 2:20:06 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post

1/14/2010 2:20:39 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
user info
edit post

i dont even want to know what you'd use a q-tip for

1/14/2010 2:21:54 PM

Slave Famous
Become Wrath
34079 Posts
user info
edit post

to get the cum out of their ears

1/14/2010 2:22:43 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post



i always heard fucking the cat with a q-tip would make her get out of heat faster

maybe that rumor was just started by a sick fuck who liked to fuck cats with q-tips

1/14/2010 2:23:53 PM

LunaK
LOSER :(
23634 Posts
user info
edit post

holy shit ^

1/14/2010 2:24:49 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
user info
edit post

double u
tee
eff

1/14/2010 2:24:59 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
user info
edit post

O_o

1/14/2010 2:25:50 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post

>.>

http://www.ubersite.com/m/93773

Quote :
"Equipment:

* 1 cat in heat
* 1 Q-tip


Procedure:

* Grab wailing, squirming cat and place it on your lap with its hind quarters readily accessible. Chances are the cat will freely offer them, if not the first time this procedure is followed, then certainly each time afterward.
* Insert the Q-tip into the cat's vagina. It will be exposed and puffy. Do not insert the Q-tip into the other orifice. Either way the cat will begin to scream, but there is a subtle and audible difference in the scream of satisfaction and the scream of rectal pain. Experiment a little until you can distinguish the two.
* Move the Q-tip in and out of the cat's vagina slowly at first, then more rapidly. No need to be gentle, no matter what you do with the Q-tip it beats a barbed cat penis digging around in there.
* You are finished when the cat is finished. You will know when the cat is finished because it will either begin immediately to have a cat orgasm, or it will run away with the Q-tip sticking out of its ass. If this happens let it enjoy itself for a few minutes before attempting to retrieve your Q-tip.
* That is it, you are done. Enjoy the peace and quiet until the cat flares up again.

What to look for: The cat orgasm that follows this procedure is something the likes of which I have never seen elsewhere. It is a wriggling, leaping, moaning dance of ecstasy that defies any experience of pleasure my mind can even begin to grasp. If humans had orgasms with the intensity of a cat serviced in this way there would be no such thing as war, hunger, capitalism or God.

Background: A cat in heat is, with few exceptions, one of the most irritating things to have living in your home. A cat in heat will follow you around and howl at you in a bone chilling, hideous wail until you are ready just to toss it outside and let it get pounded by the local tom's. After a few days of this torture having to drown a few kittens sounds relaxing. This cat-saving technique was first demonstrated to me by a terminally un-squeemish roomate of years past. "


[Edited on January 14, 2010 at 2:27 PM. Reason : .]

1/14/2010 2:27:01 PM

Skwinkle
burritotomyface
19447 Posts
user info
edit post

I think someone else posted about that recently. Or maybe it was you.

1/14/2010 2:27:39 PM

Slave Famous
Become Wrath
34079 Posts
user info
edit post

fuck that shit

thats cruel and unusual

1/14/2010 2:28:34 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post

this just makes me ROFL



Quote :
"* You are finished when the cat is finished. You will know when the cat is finished because it will either begin immediately to have a cat orgasm, or it will run away with the Q-tip sticking out of its ass. If this happens let it enjoy itself for a few minutes before attempting to retrieve your Q-tip.
"

1/14/2010 2:30:50 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
user info
edit post

a new low has been reached

1/14/2010 2:31:31 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post

i never said i did it! i always got my cats fixed at 6mos old like all GOOD OWNERS should. i follow the Bob Barker Law TYVM.

1/14/2010 2:32:06 PM

wdprice3
BinaryBuffonary
45912 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"Insert the Q-tip into the cat's vagina. It will be exposed and puffy. Do not insert the Q-tip into the other orifice."

Quote :
"run away with the Q-tip sticking out of its ass"



... well, make up your mind. anal or no anal.

1/14/2010 2:33:51 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post

aha i noticed that too

1/14/2010 2:34:20 PM

H8R
wear sumthin tight
60155 Posts
user info
edit post

i do not like cats

1/14/2010 2:35:04 PM

thumper
All American
21574 Posts
user info
edit post

i do not like you

1/14/2010 2:35:31 PM

H8R
wear sumthin tight
60155 Posts
user info
edit post

1/14/2010 2:35:51 PM

Jeepin4x4
#Pack9
35784 Posts
user info
edit post

1/14/2010 2:35:55 PM

DeltaBeta
All American
9417 Posts
user info
edit post

I think I'm horny.

1/14/2010 2:37:06 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"there is a subtle and audible difference in the scream of satisfaction and the scream of rectal pain. Experiment a little until you can distinguish the two."


sounds like high school

1/14/2010 2:38:02 PM

Mr Grace
All American
12412 Posts
user info
edit post

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_qwcqXAM-w&feature=related

1/14/2010 3:10:31 PM

Wraith
All American
27330 Posts
user info
edit post

I don't know wtf is going on but the past week there have been three individual cats running around messing with my cat. She usually stays inside and looks out the window. They come up and start pawing at the window and crap. She has been spayed so she isn't in heat and normally I only let her outside on the weekends when I'm home from work so she isn't out that much.

1/14/2010 5:27:13 PM

jocristian
All American
7529 Posts
user info
edit post

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Z1MygrkDSI

1/14/2010 5:30:01 PM

catzor
All American
1749 Posts
user info
edit post

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToWDxKqLhfY

1/14/2010 5:35:22 PM

 Message Boards » Chit Chat » my cat is in heat v3.0 Page [1]  
go to top | |
Admin Options : move topic | lock topic

© 2025 by The Wolf Web - All Rights Reserved.
The material located at this site is not endorsed, sponsored or provided by or on behalf of North Carolina State University.
Powered by CrazyWeb v2.39 - our disclaimer.