My wife and I were stuck at Wallgreens here in Milwaukee, and so far 3 people had refused to give us a jump start. One guy said "we don't have jumper cables" to which I responded "we do", he then without replying, got in his car and drove off, the second guy said he didn't have time, and so on. I then got back in the car and commented to my wife "I've never seen people be this bitchy about a jump start, I'm always happy to do it. how often do you get to do something manly and heroic that easily?" A few minutes later as I was sitting in the car a guy pulled up in a truck and asked if something was wrong, I told him, and he happily gave me a jump start, even chatted about what could have killed the battery, you know the whole little event that is jump starting a car. It turned out he was a South Carolinian on a visit to his wife's sister that just had a kid. These Northerners would have let me sit there all night.

1/23/2010 10:05:29 PM

yo holmes, to jail!

1/23/2010 10:06:12 PM

first

1/23/2010 10:06:34 PM

fuck

1/23/2010 10:06:55 PM

yo holmes

are you black?

[Edited on January 23, 2010 at 10:07 PM. Reason : that might have some effect on it]

1/23/2010 10:07:09 PM

second

1/23/2010 10:08:27 PM

fuck

1/23/2010 10:09:09 PM

i, too, have given someone a jump start while visiting the frozen north

1/23/2010 10:09:16 PM

^~

1/23/2010 10:10:22 PM

If "giving a jump" up north means screwing hot Canadian chicas then I am all for showing them some Southern hospitality!

1/23/2010 10:13:11 PM

you're queer right?^

1/23/2010 10:22:23 PM

THE DIXIE SHALL COME AGAIN

1/23/2010 10:23:02 PM

i put my car in a ditch on the way to work when i was living in illinois

it was like 6 ft down and i was eating breakfast while i was driving and just didnt make the turn

i had at least 6 cars stop and see if i was ok and i had 2 offers for a tow

i had already called AAA and was just listening to the radio hanging out waiting

car was fine i was fine and i was surprised how many people stopped to make sure i was ok and to offer help

1/23/2010 10:28:29 PM

See the difference with your story is that you have massive tits and were alone.

1/23/2010 10:30:58 PM

^

1/23/2010 10:31:55 PM

you also couldn't tell either of those things bc the ditch was so deep and all you could see was the car

thanks anyway tho

1/23/2010 10:32:14 PM

The drivers saw the car and noodle necked to see what happened, then were all "hey yo sup gurl, I heard you like driving into ditches and shit"

1/23/2010 10:33:22 PM

oh
you could tell

1/23/2010 10:33:34 PM

Quote :

"you're queer right?^"

In what bizzaro world is explicitly stating a desire to do hot Canadian chicas considered "queer"?

1/23/2010 10:34:03 PM

Quote :

" i was eating breakfast while i was driving "

female drivers

1/23/2010 10:34:15 PM

yeah, i was prob texting and trying to drink my coffee too

1/23/2010 10:35:11 PM

Quote :

"you also couldn't tell either of those things bc the ditch was so deep and all you could see was the car"

They obviously knew you were a woman since you managed to drive your car into a ditch.

1/23/2010 10:38:50 PM

Quote :

"In what bizzaro world is explicitly stating a desire to do hot Canadian chicas considered "queer"?"

you're also sorta stupid

1/23/2010 10:40:44 PM

^^ the claim was that ppl stopped bc of my massive tits and bc i was alone

neither of which could be identified from driving by

car in ditch = woman ok i can see that but it doesnt imply that im alone

1/23/2010 10:43:55 PM

^^ Confused, yes but not stupid nor queer. Sorry.

1/23/2010 10:45:10 PM

Quote :

"yo holmes are you black?"

no, it wasn't a race thing, i'm white, these folks were all white, they just seemed to think that jump starting me would harm their car somehow.

1/23/2010 10:46:27 PM

Quote :

"THROW THEM BOWS!"

1/23/2010 11:11:27 PM

wtf, dblpoast

[Edited on January 23, 2010 at 11:18 PM. Reason : luda!]

1/23/2010 11:11:51 PM

true, Wolfy, but they prolly saw your massive mammaries from the road and were like HAAAAAAAAAAY

1/23/2010 11:13:57 PM

I entered this thread expecting a jump start story and it delivered!

1/23/2010 11:15:03 PM

I'd deliver something all over you, LK

1/23/2010 11:16:03 PM

^ well it was something southerners were always happy to do when I was there. Other people would stop and be like "jump startin a car?" and they'd be like "yep". I'm surprised no one ever got out a grill and some beers and made a thing of it.

1/23/2010 11:17:27 PM

i jump started some lady on campus last week. an older dude was there and had some jumper cables, but said he couldn't figure out how to open the hood on his honda odyssey. i got a good laugh out of that. pretty pathetic. the lady also couldn't get the plastic cover off the top of the battery. she had the owner's manual out and everything. she thanked me for preventing her from being late to hosting some chinese delegates or some shit.

[Edited on January 23, 2010 at 11:20 PM. Reason : ^folks think it's something special. kinda like when yuppies get to cut down a tree, etc.]

1/23/2010 11:18:03 PM

The one that really surprised me was the last one, after two people said no I saw this big guy with an orange beard in a carhartt coat getting into an F-150, I thought he would for sure. I asked him and he said "just a sec" leaned into the truck, looked back and me and said "She won't let me", at that point I noticed a woman was in the passenger seat. I was not only disappointed to not be started, but dismayed for the male race.

1/23/2010 11:24:11 PM

haha even the redneck yankees are faggots

1/23/2010 11:27:25 PM

i never pass up an opportunity to show my manhood in public.

1/23/2010 11:31:36 PM

Quote :

"I'd deliver something all over you, LK"

ew. no.

1/23/2010 11:33:44 PM

i don't like to do it b/c i'm always paranoid that there's something wrong with their car and they'll find some way to blame it on me

same reason i don't pull folks out of ditches anymore and when i do i tell them to hook the rope wherever they want, but not to hold me accountable if the shit breaks.

1/23/2010 11:34:41 PM

dammit, i thought aaronburro had graduated out of his creepy phase

1/23/2010 11:36:17 PM

nope. doin grad school on it now

1/23/2010 11:47:10 PM

I just carry a stack of liability release forms with me in the glove box

1/23/2010 11:59:58 PM

you better with all these sue-happy folks around

1/24/2010 12:01:29 AM

Quote :

"Quote : " i was eating breakfast while i was driving " female drivers"

at least she didnt say she was eating breakfast while putting her makeup on AND driving.
i bought one of those cigarette outlet converter things so i could plug my hair straightener in for my drive to class but it blew the fuse and my radio stopped working.

1/24/2010 12:05:59 AM

my fiance has some sort of super blow dryer that actually dims the bedroom light when she turns it on

1/24/2010 12:07:38 AM

Quote :

"WALLGREENS"

1/24/2010 12:08:05 AM

I helped a lady figure out where to put oil in her car yesterday. I even took the cap off because her geriatric ass wouldn't have been able to get it off. She gave me a nickle and pinched my cheek.

1/24/2010 1:04:54 AM

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

1/24/2010 2:54:32 AM

back on topic...NC is great about people helping drivers in need. That's the South. It's the good old folks that help and not the preppy college kids though. I remember just the other day that guy died leaping off that bridge while helping after an accident. More people should care shouldn't they?

1/24/2010 3:02:42 AM

Quote :

"I just carry a stack of liability release forms with me in the glove box"

This is why I drive beaters. When the pickup truck pulls me out of a snow pile and pulls something out of place it makes no difference lol.

1/24/2010 3:20:42 AM

Southern hospitality is very real. It think it started when we were fronting and then when we were exceptionally poor.

1/24/2010 3:26:46 AM