if someone you dated in the past let you know that he/she would be interested in possibly dating/trying things again, would you consider it?


let's assume

there was no cheating/crazy fighting/illegal anything going on. More or less just didn't work out before or was bad timing.


im guessing mostly it would depend on who and the situation. But i imagine a lot of people would have a strict 'no' policy

3/23/2010 1:14:19 PM

If you desperately need some, do it.

3/23/2010 1:15:21 PM

piitb?

3/23/2010 1:15:44 PM

Quote :

"mostly it would depend on who and the situation"

things like "she was batshit crazy" or "she cheated on me" or "i caught her masturbating with the dog" would be good reasons not to do it...i've never dated someone during which it was "bad timing," and i'm not quite sure what that even means...that you or she weren't mature enough to handle a relationship at the time?

i think the rule should be "it didn't work out the first time, it's not going to work out the second time," but i suppose there are always exceptions

3/23/2010 1:16:12 PM

SUIT UP BARNEY

3/23/2010 1:19:23 PM

^^

yea maybe something like just not ready for a relationship. Perhaps you/her had just gotten out of a bad relationship and although you liked the person, wasn't ready to start anything.

3/23/2010 1:22:11 PM

why don't you start laying down some specifics

3/23/2010 1:24:38 PM

guy dates girl, lasts ~month. Girl says likes guy but just got out of a really bad relationship and not ready to get serious. Guy acts cool w/it although pretty bummed. >1yr later girl and guy run into each other, chat a little. Girl suggests to guy she would be interested in starting over/trying things again.


did girl just go out and bang a bunch of dudes or something?

[Edited on March 23, 2010 at 1:30 PM. Reason : .asdf]

3/23/2010 1:30:00 PM

you could always the assume the best and tell yourself she just needed some time and she had been thinking about you

it's even possible!

3/23/2010 1:31:17 PM

Nah - I say go for it. People definitely need time to clear their head, especially after a bad breakup.

3/23/2010 1:31:35 PM

even if she did, it's only relevant if that was her real reason for breaking things off; i.e., she lied.


In this instance, I'm inclined to say to go for it. Why haven't you already done so?

[Edited on March 23, 2010 at 1:32 PM. Reason : jh]

3/23/2010 1:31:48 PM

i, too, say go for it

3/23/2010 1:32:36 PM

mn1rocibittdnl

3/23/2010 1:33:00 PM

You should watch the movie Closer with Clive Owen.


Point being: even if somebody really fucked up, if you want them bad then you want them bad.

It depends on how strong the relationship is, but I would take them back in some cases, even if said person cheated.

[Edited on March 23, 2010 at 2:06 PM. Reason : in]

3/23/2010 2:06:10 PM

DAT ASS?

3/23/2010 2:15:06 PM

go for it but be on your guard. i too have tried getting back with a girl after failing due to what we thought was "bad timing," but it turns out we just weren't compatible to begin with. how forward was her suggestion? if it just came out of nowhere and was too direct then i would say she just sounds desperate and knows you'd have her since you did before.

3/23/2010 2:22:13 PM

how about NO?

been there, done that..

too many fishes in the sea, no matter how cray cray

3/23/2010 2:23:06 PM

If it didn't work out the first time, there's less chance of it working out the second time, but there's still a chance.

3/23/2010 2:23:50 PM

plus once you take a girl back you open up the door for her to think she can leave and come back again

not all girls do this, but a lot of them do

3/23/2010 2:25:27 PM

Ah yes. The cycle.

3/23/2010 2:26:15 PM

do it

3/23/2010 2:28:12 PM

anyone who has been in the cycle before knows to never do this again

3/23/2010 2:29:45 PM

Cheating wouldn't be a deal breaker for me

However, cheating with someone I know would

Especially if it was with my friend Gary while I was out picking up some Chinese takeout

[Edited on March 23, 2010 at 2:32 PM. Reason : x]

3/23/2010 2:32:18 PM

So you only dated for a month, what's that, a few dates? I don't think there's any reason not to give it another shot.

3/23/2010 2:32:27 PM

I think it'll always hang over the relationship that she has dumped you before. While it might not be a problem 98% of the time, do you really think you're not going to think about it the first time you get into an argument or she doesn't seem to be making enough time for you?

3/23/2010 2:35:54 PM

Cheating wouldn't be a deal breaker for me

However, cheating with a guy would

3/23/2010 2:36:02 PM

My previous question is of the utmost importance.

3/23/2010 2:37:06 PM

seriously doubt there was any cheating or anything. It just kinda ended abruptly and although said guy was upset he didn't really try and chase it down cause he's done that before and it never works. Also said guy isn't desperate or anything he still gets laid but currently is single and is considering it.


big concerns: not 100% sure why it ended. Could be what she says, could be something else


considering it, but obv would want to take things pretty slow, just see if there's even some feelings still there. if there was something wrong before would it still be there now? Is there new information or something? Is she lonely and desperate?


too much to ask for an STD test? been cheated on before, hard to 100% trust atm

3/23/2010 4:08:52 PM

I did this once and it ended horribly

3/23/2010 4:09:58 PM

Quote :

"too much to ask for an STD test? been cheated on before, hard to 100% trust atm "

Just get it done before you start doin' it. I wouldn't bring it up on the first day though.

3/23/2010 4:11:41 PM

i did this once and it lasted for 12 days

3/23/2010 4:12:44 PM

Quote :

"hard to 100% trust atm"

I would never trust atm, that's just gross

3/23/2010 4:15:03 PM

Don't do it.

I got back together with someone after I had lived elsewhere for 3 years. We had both changed too much ... grown apart, etc.

3/23/2010 4:16:14 PM

falling back on old habits during a time of weakness (cold streak) is a bad idea

3/23/2010 4:17:02 PM

^^ Yep. The biggest issue seems to be you're still the same or you're vastly different.

3/23/2010 4:17:36 PM

Quote :

"there was no cheating/crazy fighting/illegal anything going on"

most boring relationship ever?

haha jk

kind of

3/23/2010 4:19:01 PM

It comes down to whether you would rather bang with a rubber or JO

For me, I'd rather JO unless she was just an incredibly lay

Which they rarely are

3/23/2010 4:19:08 PM

they dated for a month. they barely had time to get to know each other.

[Edited on March 23, 2010 at 4:19 PM. Reason : .]

3/23/2010 4:19:28 PM

Quote :

"Nah - I say go for it. People definitely need time to clear their head, especially after a bad breakup."

This.

3/23/2010 4:19:56 PM

Quote :

"It comes down to whether you would rather bang with a rubber or JO For me, I'd rather JO unless she was just an incredibly lay"

She was the Pelé of anal

3/23/2010 4:22:22 PM

Just go out on a date with her, see how it goes. You don't have to marry the girl or anything.

3/23/2010 4:22:27 PM

In that case fuck this bitch right here on the spot bare till she passes out and forgot how she got there

3/23/2010 4:23:09 PM

Never have. Never will.

not to say that I never WOULD.

3/23/2010 4:25:23 PM

in this case - i think it's probably not a horrible idea.

in a lot of cases - BAD IDEA

3/23/2010 4:26:34 PM

not ready for a relationship = wants to fuck more dudes

3/23/2010 4:27:51 PM

Quote :

"Just go out on a date with her, see how it goes. You don't have to marry the girl or anything."

i figure if we just meet up for drinks it cant hurt



and honestly the sex was pretty awesome, cant deny that. Trying not to take that into account tho

3/23/2010 4:37:45 PM

tell her you wanna play doctor

3/23/2010 4:38:37 PM

Quote :

"if someone you dated in the past let you know that he/she would be interested in possibly dating/trying things again, would you consider it? let's assume there was no cheating/crazy fighting/illegal anything going on. More or less just didn't work out before or was bad timing."

I've been in this situation, we tried things again.


In July we'll have been married for 5 years.

[Edited on March 23, 2010 at 4:39 PM. Reason : twas bad timing]

3/23/2010 4:38:53 PM

well theres a happy ending

3/23/2010 4:42:28 PM

thinking back to my last 5 girlfriends: yes, fuck no, no, no, and no

3/23/2010 4:50:20 PM