Share your best dating advice ITT:

Here's the dating advice I gave to a guy friend yesterday:

Him: "I'm doing Bikram yoga with this cute girl I'm trying to impress. Got any tips?"
Me: "First, you will die. Second, try not to fart. Unless she thinks farting is funny. Yoga makes people fart."
Him: "I don't think we're at a place yet where I can fart around her comfortably."
Me: "You're screwed. No more yoga dates, k?"

4/9/2010 9:15:21 AM

I'm confused, is he going on dates with her to Yoga, or is she in his yoga class and he's trying to holler?

4/9/2010 9:16:16 AM

She invited him to Bikram yoga and he agreed.

Bad idea. Bikram makes you sweat like a pig and it makes some people fart. Not great when you're trying to impress someone. Bad date choice.

4/9/2010 9:17:22 AM

Agreed.

4/9/2010 9:18:02 AM

For the ladies: fuck on the first date
For the fellas: fuck bitches, get money

4/9/2010 9:20:06 AM

^ Agreed.

4/9/2010 9:20:21 AM

4/9/2010 9:21:26 AM

haha that's kinda mean of her to invite a guy to bikram on a date

4/9/2010 9:22:41 AM

^ That's what I thought! He texted me and asked if he was going to die. My first question: Is it Bikram? If so, yes. You're definitely going to die. He told me he would text me to let me know he survived. So either he got some after the date, or he died.




[Edited on April 9, 2010 at 9:24 AM. Reason : .]

4/9/2010 9:22:46 AM

he obviously doesn't realize he's already in the friends zone

4/9/2010 9:23:02 AM

Chicks: Don't be fat.
Dudes: Don't be fat or poor.

4/9/2010 9:23:17 AM

It doesn't matter how fat or ugly a dude is if he's rich

4/9/2010 9:26:58 AM

my advice: dont bring up you spend alot of time on tww

4/9/2010 9:28:28 AM

For a first date, be careful to avoid the following foods: garlic, chili, onions, salmon and everclear. You don't want to taste like strong foods or vomit when you share your first romantic embrace.

4/9/2010 9:28:55 AM

i would just avoid food all together

4/9/2010 9:29:31 AM

But if you're drinking wine on a first date, it's smart to eat something so you don't get wobbly and stupid.

4/9/2010 9:30:15 AM

How do I curb my inevitable erection when I get my first romantic embrace someday?

4/9/2010 9:30:28 AM

just fuck before you eat, then it doesnt matter what you eat

4/9/2010 9:30:39 AM

^^ duct tape

4/9/2010 9:30:56 AM

pre-embrace beat off

4/9/2010 9:31:46 AM

1.)poke her leg
2.)move your eyebrows up and down a few times
3.)...
4.)profit

4/9/2010 9:34:57 AM

^

4/9/2010 9:45:45 AM

"Pardon me, madam. I wish to inquire about the olfactory response one would have whilst taking in the aromas of your birth canal."

4/9/2010 9:50:45 AM

Ladies: Pack sneakers in your purse so you can make a mad dash through the bar/restaurant and into the getaway car if the guy sucks.
Men: Conveniently forget your wallet.

4/9/2010 9:59:50 AM

do some push ups before a date so your muscles are bigger

4/9/2010 10:01:25 AM

Hay guiz, u wan 2 take bikram fart yoga class wif me?

4/9/2010 10:01:34 AM

Ladies: Stuff your bra.
Fellas: Stuff your pants.

4/9/2010 10:01:50 AM

Fellas: Stuff your pants. wallet.

4/9/2010 10:14:22 AM

be polite and be yourself

4/9/2010 10:33:07 AM

Quote :

"Chicks: Don't be fat bitches. Dudes: Don't be fat or poor."

4/9/2010 10:35:19 AM

wtf is bikram yoga?? is that like hot yoga??

Quote :

"he obviously doesn't realize he's already in the friends zone"

I think he's out of the friend zone for now. A lunch date is friend zone material. A yoga date is not.

4/9/2010 10:46:18 AM

A yoga date is just kind of odd. Not really friend zone, but an odd choice for a date. It's very hot. From wikipedia:

Quote :

"Bikram's Beginning Yoga Class runs approximately 90 minutes, incorporates a series of 26 postures and 2 breathing exercises, and is ideally practiced in a room heated to a MINIMUM of 105°F (usually hotter) with a humidity of 40%."

4/9/2010 10:49:09 AM

Quote :

"Fellas: Stuff your pants."

Shit, I can barely fit my package into my pants as it is son.

4/9/2010 10:49:48 AM

Quote :

"A yoga date is just kind of odd. Not really friend zone, but an odd choice for a date. It's very hot. From wikipedia:"

I guess...I've been invited on several yoga dates before (always declined), never thought it was weird. Although a majority of them were by girls who actually taught the yoga class...so I guess that's different.

I think it's a girl's attempt at taking initiative and doing something different. Although a girl might want to ask a guy out...it's still kinda weird for a girl to ask another guy out to dinner. So a girl asking a guy to do something like yoga, is almost the same a guy asking a girl out to dinner.

That's just my small opinion on the subject.

4/9/2010 11:04:15 AM

1. Take her to a nice romantic comedy.
2. Order large popcorn.
3. Cut hole in the bottom of popcorn bag.
4. Profit.

4/9/2010 11:08:05 AM

^lol

Quote :

"She invited him to Bikram yoga and he agreed. Bad idea. Bikram makes you sweat like a pig and it makes some people fart. Not great when you're trying to impress someone. Bad date choice. "

eh, i dont think its a bad idea...even if he decides not to go again, at least he showed he was outgoing.

she might want to see him all sweaty



[Edited on April 9, 2010 at 11:11 AM. Reason : k]

4/9/2010 11:10:16 AM

Went on one "workout date". Not yoga, just running, but it was a mistake. She was in much better shape than me and I couldn't keep up. I tried to match her 7 minute pace for as long as I could but in the end I had to pull up huffing and puffing like Seth Rogen in Superbad. She laughed and joked with me and said no big deal but by that point I was totally emasculated, and after lightly jogging back to the car I never called her again. A shame too, because she was pretty and an excellent cook.

4/9/2010 11:11:26 AM

lol..damn...man, i guess i dont see the problem...sounds like that was something that could be overlooked, that she wa a better runner...now if she can bench more than you, well thats a different story

4/9/2010 11:13:29 AM

I have a very hard time accepting inferiority in any contest of athletic prowess, especially from a girl

When I play them in tennis, I never "let them win" to be a nice guy...shits always 6-1, 6-0

4/9/2010 11:16:00 AM

I don't play girls in sports that I know they are better than me in. I've dated a collegiate swimmer and tennis player. So when they ask me to go for a swim or hit a few balls on the court...I politely decline. Same goes with the yoga teacher. I'm pretty competitive, I don't let girls win in darts/pool/video games/etc. I'll keep it close to let them feel good...but the whole "you gotta let the girl win" mantra is bull shit.

I've dated a few competitive runners...and ran a 5K with one...but I was in good running shape at the time and dusted her ass. She actually didn't like it. Fuck her. She should have known that an exceptional female athlete is still inferior to an above average male athlete.

4/9/2010 11:21:37 AM

^ my ex was uber competitive. really bad actually. got super pissed when i'd win at board games or whatever. there was a board game that family witnessed that especially bad. we broke up a while ago - and they still will bring it up

4/9/2010 11:23:03 AM

move on kiddo!

4/9/2010 11:28:39 AM

Dating advice:

On first date, alcohol should be involved. Try to avoid drunkeness...but it's okay if you both get drunk. But a little alcohol usually brings out the crazy if there is any. So you can figure that shit out quick and get out if need be.

4/9/2010 11:35:45 AM

don't think I ever want to date a chick who asks me out, they always end up crazy

4/9/2010 11:38:42 AM

lucyinthesky giving dating advice is like a homeless man giving finical advice.

4/9/2010 11:51:11 AM

Quote :

"I guess...I've been invited on several yoga dates before (always declined), never thought it was weird. Although a majority of them were by girls who actually taught the yoga class...so I guess that's different. I think it's a girl's attempt at taking initiative and doing something different. Although a girl might want to ask a guy out...it's still kinda weird for a girl to ask another guy out to dinner. So a girl asking a guy to do something like yoga, is almost the same a guy asking a girl out to dinner."

I think interactive sports make sense for a date, but yoga is very much an individual activity and you can't talk during a class. Running, tennis, wakeboarding, hiking and surfing make much better sense, IMO.

4/9/2010 11:54:09 AM

oh GGMon being an ass - how surprising

4/9/2010 11:55:00 AM

Meh. You have to talk before class. Then maybe she wants to see how "game" you are for something different (if you don't already do yoga)...and/or see what kind of shape you are in.

Then you can always get some coffee or a smoothie afterwards and talk some more. I think its a pretty good idea as long as you have a little something planned afterwards.

4/9/2010 11:55:51 AM

like a fat guy giving dieting advice.

4/9/2010 11:58:54 AM

Hey, I'm good at dating. It's just I'm not good at relationships.

4/9/2010 12:00:09 PM